3 Dom Sub Contracts:
Examples Made Easy
You deserve a BDSM contract that suits you.
Dom: Hey! Who said you could use my phone?
Sub: (Giggles & taps 3rd page of the dom-sub contract.)
Dom: WTF? I didn’t sign-off on that, did I?
Note 2: Also, contracts aren’t for everyone. People with ‘documentation’, ‘discipline’, or ‘ritual’ kinks, for example, are often great candidates for dom-sub contracts. Free-love, nudist colony, hippie-types on the other hand, are far less likely to seek out bdsm contracts like we discuss here. (Which isn’t to say that they can’t.)
Why use a dom sub contract?
Communication is literally the entire foundation of all relationships.
So, a written agreement helps communication because…
- It’s a great way to start that conversation.
- It helps to bring up difficult topics with one another.
- It clarifies expectations, wants, and limits.
And before entering any relationship, isn’t it wise to know exactly what you’re getting into? In fact, most vanilla marriages would likely benefit a vanilla contract too.
Still, you don’t actually ‘need’ a contract.
But for some it’s sexy to have an excuse to discuss sexual rewards & punishments openly (and out loud) with a partner you trust.
And signing a contract isn’t about being pedantic, or trying to force someone to stay with you.
A dom sub contract is aimed at open communication and coming to an agreement, then referring back to that agreement as your relationship grows.
How do you know which contract suits you?
Ask yourself…
What’s your kink style?
Are you new to bdsm, a former-vanilla type?
Or are you a bdsm expert in a TPE relationship?
What’s your contract style?
Do you like lighter, more general contracts?
Or do you prefer in-depth, detailed contracts?
New to BDSM?
If you're a new kinkster, you may want extra safety and security in your contract.
Unlike long-term kink-partners, where mutual trust and respect are basically a given, if you or your partner is a novice who’d like more certainty of where they stand, consider clauses like:
- The Dominant agrees to discipline only to better the submissive, and never to punish out of (or during) feelings of anger.
- The submissive agrees to always be honest and sincere with their feelings and never to emotionally manipulate, abuse, or gaslight The Dominant.
Bdsm veteran?
If you're a veteran kinkster, you may want extra details &specifics in your contract.
Veteran kinksters often have a lot of the basics covered, so the right contract for them can benefit from extra details. You may want to consider clauses like:
- The Dominant will make a concerted effort to express when he finds another person attractive rather than keeping it to themselves.
- The submissive will address The Dominant by ‘Master’, or replace that with ‘Sir’ when privacy dictates, and remain within eyesight of The Dominant unless otherwise permitted.
General contacts:
These are more vague and open-ended, requiring more trust from each partner.
Example lines from a light, general, dom-sub contract.
1. The Dominant, [insert name], will care for the submissive’s physical, emotional, mental well-being until this contract expires.
2. The submissive, [insert name], will obey The Dominant’s rules and agrees to submit to the dominant’s punishment upon breaking one.
3. This contract can’t be altered, but either party can end this contract at any time (and make a new one if desired.)
Detailed contacts:
These are more rigorous and detailed, requiring less trust from each partner.
Example lines from a rigorous detailed dom-sub contract.
1. This agreement defines in precise terms relationship and interaction between two individuals, hereafter called the ‘submissive’ and the ‘Dominant.’ This particular contract applies to monogamous relationships only, and is entered into consensually with both parties agreeing to the conditions.
2. This agreement is intended to guide and align both parties in the relationship as long as their journey together exists, but amendments can be made if both parties agree.
3. The main intention of this contract is to please the Dominant & elevate the submissive. It’s meant to help the couple grow together emotionally, mentally, and physically as well. This document is the basis for a consensual relationship between the Dominant and the submissive with the intention of increasing health and happiness in both parties lives.
4. Etcetera, etcetera, etcetera…
Free Contract Samples
There's a short & simple contract, as well as a long & detailed contract, choose whichever one suits you best. They're completely free, no popups, forms, or emails to enter.
Free Short & Simple Dom Sub Contract Sample
This dom sub contract lets the submissive alert the Dominant of any issues – physical, mental, or emotional, and you can add any similar items. Perhaps something about bruises, or certain times of the month. Click here to download it.
Free Long & Detailed Dom Sub Contract Sample
This more detailed dom sub contract covers everything in the simple contract, but does it in a more 24/7 power-exchange way, touching on limits, public behavior, expanded duties, and more. Click here to download it.
OLD
'Sample Sub Contract' (Found, 2019)
This is an old contract we found somewhere years ago. For some reason, people keep finding it on google, so we figured we'd link it. Personally, the contracts above seem like better choices, but it's here for posterity. Click here to download it.
Now, you’re welcome to use these however you want, but we highly suggest not using them ‘as is.’
They’re meant mainly for inspiration, and they may cover more than you need, or may not cover enough, and they’re aimed to be examples to get you thinking about what to include in your own contract.
A BDSM contract can be a truly unique, special, meaningful representation of your relationship with your partner(s), and it will serve you well to put some effort into customizing yours.
Customizing Your Contract
(You're unique, your relationship is unique, so your contract should be unique.)
Sections To Think About:
- Rules For The Overall Document
- Dom/Sub Roles & Duties
- Meals
- Appearance
- Pleasure, etc.
- Private/Public Behavior
- Scenes & Safewords
- Limits & Boundaries
- Safewords
- Soft Limits
- Hard Limits
- Punishment & Discipline
- Well-Being & Accident-Handling
- Aftercare
- Rituals
- Medical History
- Third Parties, Polyamory, Exclusivity
- Photos, Videos, & Recording
- Terms & Rights
- Vetoes
- Privacy/Confidentiality
- Areas Of Control
- Legalese & Alterations
- Signatures & Witnesses
You don't need to include all these things, but some of them may be relevant to your situation, so please give them thought and consideration.
Special thanks to some of the sites that inspired us: EvilMonk.org, DomSubLiving.com, BadGirlsBible.com, SubmissiveGuide.com, O.School, and BDSMContracts.org.
That concludes '3 Dom Sub Contracts: Examples Made Easy', courtesy of J-Ryze & Cyn. Hope you enjoyed!
Wishing you a wonderfully kinky BDSM life!
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