Why You Can’t Fund Your Bimbofication Aesthetic (Emma’s Tale)
Hint: It mostly comes down to bad beliefs, bad attitudes, and bad approaches.
“You were wrong, Dad, it’s basically impossible to make enough money to fund my new bimbofication aesthetic.”
It had been weeks since Emma started ‘breaking bimbo’, and she’d become frustrated at her lack of progress. Unsurprisingly, she brought that frustration to me. As usual, I was in the middle of something, and as usual, I was faced with a choice: Do I let her figure it out on her own so the lessons stick, or do I give her true answers I’ve learned over decades of studying money, beauty, society, psychology, and more?
“Emma, what have I taught you about bringing up heavy topics while I’m making lunch? And also, what have I taught you about saying something is impossible?”
“Sorry. And I said ‘basically’ impossible. Breast augmentation prices are ridiculous.”
“Tossing the word ‘basically’ into your sentence doesn’t magically save the vibe and intention behind your statement. You know well and good what you meant, and so do I.”
“Fine! Whatever! I do mean it’s impossible, because it is!”
“OK then, I’ll just go play some League Of Legends then.” I said, turning my back to Emma and making as if to leave the kitchen.
“What? Why? You’re my Dad, shouldn’t you be helping me?”
“Well, I’m not foolish enough to bang my head against a wall on something that’s impossible, so let’s just move on.”
“Wait, wait, don’t go. I know it’s possible to make money, but why has it been so hard?”
“Oh, so at first you were positive it was impossible, but when you realize your teacher might leave, suddenly you believe it’s just ‘hard?’ OK, I’m going to keep leaving until you believe ‘making money is easy.’” I put down my mustard-coated knife and turned to leave once more.
“Dad!” Emma’s eyes popped wide.
“I’m serious, because there’s no point teaching someone how to make money if they have bad beliefs rooted deep inside them. The first step to accomplishing anything is to believe that you’re capable of it, believe that you can make it fun, and believe that with practice, even hard things become easy. If you don’t hold these basic beliefs about what you want to learn, you’re just wasting your teacher’s time, and your own.”
“So you won’t even talk to me unless I believe making money is easy?”
I turned to face Emma, my face serious. “Correct. In my career, I don’t teach any student who won’t even believe in themselves, and I’m not doing it with my daughter either. So relax your anger and frustration, realize that many, many, many humans have been making money in a variety of ways from selling pet rocks to selling debt for centuries, and had fun doing it.
Admit that you can join them, and if it doesn’t feel easy now, that with practice, you can make it feel easy… or there’s literally no point in studying or learning anything about money.”
“Geez. You’re kind of a hard-ass.”
I chopped my sandwich diagonally, creating two elegant triangles. (Triangle sandwiches just taste better to me, I can’t explain it.) “Language, miss.” Emma’s pout wasn’t going to get her any sympathy from me.
My daughter had been coddled enough by her friends, sister, and mom. None of them had given her the hard truths about making money she needed. They all avoided getting into it with Emma because they were afraid of conflict, tears, and ruffling Em’s feathers. I wasn’t going to fall into the same trap.
“Ok, ok, fine. I believe making money is easy, I just don’t know how, and I can learn with practice. Will you teach me, please and thank you?” Emma batted her lashes.
“That’s more like it. Yes, I will.”
“Great! What should I learn first?”
I did love how eager Emma was to learn from me, once we got over some of her resistance and moodiness though. I’d never tell Cassie this, but despite her initial prickliness, Emma was my favorite student. “Well, since you already displayed a few bad beliefs about money, we’ll probably have to replace some other ones too.”
“No way, I’m good now, I honestly believe making money is easy, lots of people do it, I just have to learn and practice.”
“Oh really.” I rolled my eyes.
“Yes, really.”
“So if I say, ‘collaborating with other models will explode your income,’ you’re gonna go off and get started on collaborations right away?”
“Well, no. Because collabing can blow up in your face. I’ve tried it a bunch of times in my modeling career. I could get blocked, doxxed, or associated with the wrong people just by doing it.”
“And you don’t think your answer indicates bad beliefs about collaboration? You think if I talked to other successful bimbos like Marilyn Monroe, Anna Nicole Smith, or Alicia Amira they’d spew all this bitterness and fear regarding collabs?”
Emma glanced at her feet. “Err…I guess not.”
“You betcha. They’d probably tell you that they love collabs so much, that they had to find a way to bring security to shoots to make sure they could continue collabing with abandon, so they invested energy into getting a bodyguard.
They’d probably tell you that they know some people are flaky or bad to collab with, but that they kept collaboration up anyway because all they needed was one good one out of a hundred bad ones to really blow up. They’d probably tell you that they’re bold, fearless, and confident in controlling the narrative, so they don’t worry about people trash-talking them. They’d probably tell you they conduct themselves so professionally that they’re basically beyond reproach when collaborating.
Your heroes probably had great beliefs about collaboration.”
“Geez. I get it, yes.”
“So then we’ve discovered a ‘bad belief’ you had about collaboration and earning, already, yes?”
Emma sighed. “Yeah.”
“And since that’s the fourth bad money belief I’ve corrected in about as many minutes, would you say it’s likely you have other bad beliefs hiding in your excuses, just like there was on the topic of collaboration as income?”
“Mmmhmm.”
“Not, ‘mmhmm’, say it.”
“Ugh! Do I have to? This is sadistic.”
“Oh my sweet girl, I’m not doing this to be mean, I’m doing it because it’s proper teaching. it’s important for the student to say and admit the truth, so that we both have a starting point and agreement on what needs to be worked on here.”
“Fine. Whatever. Yes, it’s likely I have other bad beliefs, hiding in my excuses.”
“That’s better. And you should be proud, because most people can’t admit they have bad beliefs holding them back. Most people desperately need to believe they’re ‘doing everything right,’ and that making money is just ‘impossible.’ Most people refuse to take advice from others because it would mean admitting they ‘don’t know something’ or that they have to ‘make big changes’ in how they’re approaching abundance. You’ve just set yourself apart from those stubborn souls.”
“Well, ok, thank you.”
“Actually, thank you, you’ve just gone from petulant and stubborn to teachable, in a handful of minutes. I’m very grateful. Now, let’s replace any bad beliefs we can together, sound good?”
“Yes! Let’s go! Please!”
“OK, what have you done so far to raise funds for your bimbofication?”
“I started a Kickstarter, tried to sell NFTs, and, uh… I…”
“What, my love?”
“…tried to find a sugar-daddy.”
I rolled my eyes. “Ah, I can see why you hesitated. Pretty awkward to discuss that with your Dad, but you know I don’t judge, no worries. Anyway, how did these efforts turn out?”
“They all sucked…
All my money-making attempts were a giant waste of time.”
“Oh really? Does that statement sound like it’s hiding a bad belief to you?”
“No. They really were a waste of time.”
“You sure? Thomas Edison failed thousands of attempts at nailing the lightbulb, were those a waste of his time?”
“I guess not.”
“JK Rowling got rejected by twelve publishers before succeeding with Harry Potter, were those attempts a waste of her time?”
“No.”
“So were your money-making endeavors truly a waste of time? Or were they the right thing to do, applying yourself the best way you know how, aiming for success and learning from every failure?”
“The second. They were the right thing to do.”
“And have others succeeded with kickstarters, NFTs, and uh, sugar-daddies?”
“Yeah, they have.”
“So is it just a matter of learning to believe, act, and approach those things similar to them? Is it possible for you to also succeed with these things, with a bit more study and practice?”
“Yeah, I guess.”
“Good, so we’ve replaced another limiting belief of yours together. We replaced ‘my failed money-making attempts were a waste’ with ‘my money-making attempts were the right thing and a good foundation for future money-making with a bit more study & practice.’ We also replaced ‘earning is impossible’ with ‘I’m capable of earning’ and we replaced ‘earning is hard’ with ‘practice makes earning easy’ earlier. How do you feel about all this?”
“I feel way better than when we started. And I’m starting to feel more confident about making money, but I’m not quite there yet.”
“Well, that’s something. Let’s keep going. Why did your kickstarter fail?”
“I got a few donations from simps, but it wasn’t even a thousand bucks in thirty days.”
“I see. How did you promote it?”
“I just put a link to it in my Instagram and OnlyFans bios.”
“That’s all you did for promotion?”
“Yes?”
“Wait, you got hundreds of dollars donated to you… for nothing, and you call that a failure?”
“Well, a boob-job is like nine grand, so… yeah.”
“Oh honey, I love you, but you have no clue how money works or abundance flows, lol.”
“I blame you and Mom for not teaching me.”
“Oh, such a burn. But I only teach what you asked, and this is the first time you asked to learn how to raise bimbo funding.”
“Touche.”
“Anyway, anyone I know would be thrilled to get a few hundred dollars simply for throwing up a link. There are people working for like fifteen dollars for an hour of hard labor, and you copy and paste a link, go about your life, and thirty days later, you have hundreds of dollars given to you for free. That is something to be grateful for, not dismissive of.”
“Hmmm, I never really thought about it like that.”
“Clearly. And that’s the problem. Money flows to people who are grateful for it. And not just ‘slightly grateful’ people, but truly, deeply grateful people. If you aren’t grateful for what you have, you won’t be given more. This applies to everyone, everywhere, throughout all time. Feel free to look into it yourself if you don’t believe me, but it’s basically a universal law.”
“Ouch. Sounds like it’s one I’ve been breaking.”
“Indeed, and that will keep you from earning much at all.”
“Dang. OK, how do I fix my gratitude?”
“Practice being grateful. Be grateful for every oxygen-rich breath in your lungs.
Be grateful for every drop of water that hydrates you.
Be grateful for every chance you have to make ‘simps’ happy.
Be grateful for the Kickstarter platform that allows you to easily receive funds.
Be grateful that your body is beautiful and seen as valuable by others.
Practice gratitude, my darling daughter. Practice, practice, practice.”
“I will, but do you have any tips?”
“Yes, write at least three things you’re grateful for when you awake, and three more when you sleep. And make them count, don’t just do it on autopilot. Think and feel deeply about them and choose different things to be grateful for each time. And if you catch yourself only doing three each time, and never pushing for more, consider that you’re doing the bare minimum, and the heroes you look up to are grateful for much more than that.”
“OK, I’ll do it! And that will make me more money?”
“It will, but not with that attitude.”
“What attitude?”
“The money-hungry, money-obsessed, money-focused attitude where you’re ‘doing gratitude’ not for gratitude’s sake, but with the agenda of leveraging it into wealth. It won’t work.”
“But you just said gratitude would work.”
“It will, but let me ask you, do you think any of your heroes, Marilyn, Anna-Nicole, even Beyonce approach their gratitude like that?”
“No, they’re probably just thankful, truly in their heart, with no agenda.”
“Do you think they ever approached gratitude with an agenda? Do you think if they did, that they would do so for very long?”
“They probably never did it, or if they did, realized it was a crappy way to behave.”
“Exactly. So like I said, your gratitude won’t work or generate much abundance at all, if it’s done with any agenda beyond true appreciation.”
“Hmm. How come?”
“Because money is not something to aim for, money is a side-effect.”
“What does that even mean?”
“It means that money isn’t a ‘real’ thing. It’s just a symbol. The way wealth started was with bartering. One caveman served up real value to another caveman, and received value in return.”
“Wait, money isn’t real?”
“Not exactly. It’s something humanity made up to keep track of something very important. Value. And since it was cumbersome to trade giant livestock like oxen all day, humans eventually graduated to using seashells as symbols of value, then gold bars, then paper money, now it’s just digital numbers in bank accounts and crypto wallets.”
“So the economy will flow money to me, but not if I chase money.”
“Right. The economy will flow money to you if you focus on serving up value to others, because money is just a symbol used to keep track of ‘value served.’”
“Are you sure there aren’t people who just chase money and get it?”
“Does it really matter? Do you really feel good inside when you’re obsessed with money?”
“No, but I just wanna know.”
“Let’s see… Marilyn Monroe made quite a decent amount of money, but clearly wasn’t chasing it at the start, since she got paid almost nothing for her Playboy shoot. Do you think she cared, or she was just happy to provide value to photographers, viewers, and Hugh Hefner?”
“She was probably just happy to provide value.”
“Right, and the money increased as her serving-up value to the world increased.”
“And Anna-Nicole Smith made quite a decent chunk of cash early in her career, and landed a rich sugar-daddy in the latter parts. But do you really think she was focused on chasing money, or was she focused on having the best body she could, mastering sexy poses, collaborating with better and better photographers, creating better calendars, and landing better roles?
Is it likely she deliberately targeted a sugar-daddy, or is it more likely she attracted one as a side-effect of her focus on excelling at her bimbo-career.”
“Probably the latter.”
“Exactly, and as she leveled up her own looks, craft, and collabs, the universe delivered abundance to match.”
“Well, what about someone like Warren Buffet, he was just aiming for money, right?”
“Nope, he was aiming to be a talented investor. He studied investing. He studied risk/reward. He studied life skills. He wasn’t looking for some get-rich quick scheme, and he wasn’t motivated by money. Instead, he embraced failure and had many failed investments, but like everyone else I’ve mentioned, he eventually got wealth as a side-effect.
He became a high-value, talented investor, and he was thankful for every chance he had to improve and practice. And as he got better and better, the universe rewarded him with more and more wealth.”
“What if I just want to win the lottery?”
“Well, you can actually manifest that, look up Helene Hadsell, The Contest Queen. But first, ask yourself if you came to earth to provide very little value and be rewarded with insane amounts of cash. If you can honestly answer yes, ‘I’m fine with that,’ guess what, you’ll *still* have to provide value in order to win the lottery.”
“How so?”
“Because it takes clear desire, positive beliefs, and resistance-free choices to get the winning ticket, and all three things are quite valuable. On top of that, many lottery winners just burn through their winnings and end up back at zero because they’re not at a proper level of value and abundance-mindset to sustain it, so their cash just flows back into the economy anyway, which is valuable for others who have truly ‘earned’ the cash by providing value.”
“So basically, I can’t avoid providing value, and even lottery winners provide value before or after getting the cash in order to sustain it.”
“Yep. And why is this so?”
“Because money is just a symbol that reflects actual value served up to the world.”
“Bingo. And let’s be honest, how much value did tossing up a Kickstarter link provide?”
“Yikes, barely any. Sigh. I just wanna have my new bimbofication aesthetic.”
“And let’s say you made it a really compelling narrative, with lots of perks for donors and stuff, so it was a more valuable campaign– the question still remains…
…How many fans did you get it in front of?”
“I dunno, I have 10,000 followers, but they probably all didn’t see it, so, maybe a thousand?”
“Right. And in her early years Marilyn got herself in front of hundreds of thousands by risking her nudes in Playboy.
(She posed nude for just fifty dollars and the photographer sold the photos to Hugh Hefner for five-hundred after she became more well-known. But Marilyn was unashamed, and Hef made amends to her later on, and he’s even buried next to her.)
In Nike’s early years, they got themselves in front of hundreds of thousands by doing the legwork of visiting stadiums and track meets all across the country. In Hotmail’s early years, they got themselves in front of hundreds of thousands by generously offering a free hotmail account at the bottom of every email sent.
Serving up value to a thousand humans on a planet of eight billion is kind of pathetic.”
“Hey!”
“Relax, I’m not calling you pathetic, my love. I’m saying that the ‘symbol of money’ will only trickle to someone who doesn’t do the legwork of getting exposure and serving a reasonable amount of people. The people you look up to woke up Every. Frickin’. Day, with an intense focus on improving their offering, improving their marketing, improving their reach, improving their brand, improving their exposure, improving their service, and doing so creatively with whatever resources they had at the time, complete with a happy heart full of gratitude for the opportunity.
Would you say that’s your attitude towards using your beauty? Are you honestly telling me you’ve been focused on serving up extreme value to as many as you could reach, and continually seeking new ways to do that even more?”
Emma cheeks flushed a deep crimson. “I…no.”
“So then is it any wonder your Kickstarter campaign failed?”
“No, it makes perfect sense why it failed. I could’ve handled it so much better, and made it truly valuable and compelling for my fans. I could’ve served it up to them with a full-heart, agenda-free, and been grateful for the opportunity. I could’ve been a better, kinder, more abundantly-minded bimbo. Thank you for helping me see this, I’m sorry I was so entitled earlier.”
“All good, that’s a big admission and realization, but don’t pat yourself on the back just yet, because lots of students I teach at school get excited when they learn something new, but they only get it on an intellectual level. They often fail to go home and practice it, embody it, and live it. The real wisdom comes when you put your new knowledge to the test.
The 100-For-1 Rule scares a lot of people off.”
“What’s that?”
“I can’t really get into it deeply here, but basically, it takes 100 [X]’s for every [Y] you want to get. So it takes 100 views to get 1 comment, and it takes 100 comments to get 1 follower, and it takes 100 followers to get 1 bio-click, and it takes 100 link-clicks to get one sale. It’s not an exact rule –many people can get two for every hundred or even five or ten– but it’s a very good rule of thumb to manage expectations for beginner value-providers.
The thing is, when people realize it takes 100 comments just to get one follower, they get discouraged and think ‘this is too much work’, but that’s not how Nike approached it when grinding out track meets, it’s not how Sara Blakely approached it when trying to get investors for Spanx, and it’s not how Marilyn Monroe approached it when trying to become a movie star.
They all embraced the 100-For-1 Rule and did whatever legwork needed to be done. And they did it with a happy heart… not bitterness, resentment, or discouragement.”
“Well, I’m psyched to start a new Kickstarter Campaign and do it right. And I know it’s gonna be a lot of work, but I’m happy to do it, ‘cause it’ll be a fun adventure to my fans and I’ll give them the best perks and a great story of helping someone’s bimbofication dreams.”
“And what if it fails again?”
“I’ll be grateful for the chance to study, practice, and learn, and I know that I did the right thing. But I’m feeling so good and confident with my new mindset on money, I really can see it succeeding. If I could get hundreds while being an entitled bitch, imagine how much I’ll get if I really turn up my value!”
“That’s my girl.”
“Only thing is, I think I’ll need way more followers. Like you said, I should be serving up value to way more than ten thousand peeps”
“Good point. And how can you grow your followers?”
“I don’t know, I only get a handful at a time.”
“Oh really? Might there be another bad belief hidden in that complaint?”
“Grrr. Maybe? I dunno. I guess all my beliefs just suck.”
“I’m not saying that, but the truth is the truth. You either have awesome beliefs on the topic of gaining followers, like your heroes did, or you have crappy ones. I can’t magically change that fact, and only you know the truth of your beliefs or not.”
“Fine, yes, this is another bad belief related to money and reach and growth.”
“I agree, but at least admitting it lets you fix and address it. Would pretending all your beliefs are god-tier help at all? Would denying your bad beliefs lead you to a wisdom-filled conversation, or would it just make me say ‘okay, your beliefs are fine, lets not teach anything in this key area of fan-growth?’”
“You’re right, denial wouldn’t help anything. I’m glad I admitted it, even if it feels like hell, and I know I’ll have to make big changes in my life once we’re done fixing this.”
“Haha, yes, most people deny their weaknesses because addressing bad beliefs does require major life changes. In fact, many people pretend they’re smarter than the people advising them because they feel like they’ll be losing themselves or their identity by admitting others know more… but you literally need to become a new person if you want new results, so, good on ya.”
“That’s an interesting perspective.”
“What is?”
“That people cling to bad beliefs because letting them go feels like self-death.”
“Oh, yes, well, it’s common behavior. But let’s not get distracted by others. You were wise enough to admit you have a bad belief about fan-growth, what is it?”
“I’m not sure. Probably that it’s hard to gain fans, or not fun, or boring?”
“Or all three? Anyway, again, let’s compare you to the heroes you’re trying to be like. Do you think Marilyn, Anna-Nicole, or Alicia believed it was hard, unfun, or boring to gain fans?”
“No, they probably believed the opposite, that it’s easy and fun to gain fans.”
“So can you instantly believe what your heroes believed?”
“No, it feels pretty hard to believe that.”
“But even that is a belief, right? Like, someone like myself might believe adopting my hero’s beliefs is easy and I can do it instantly, n’est-ce pas?”
“Quit being meta. I just don’t think I can believe it right now, ok?”
“Fair enough. Let me ask you this then, why do fans follow a creator?”
“I dunno, because they like them?”
“Well, you have some haters that follow you, so that probably isn’t the reason, right?”
“Then because they find them interesting, even to hate on?”
“Maybe. But what is behind that interest?”
“I dunno, they’re bored and need something to hate on? They’re powerless and like feeling judgy and self-righteous?”
“Ah, so they follow you because it helps them feel something?”
“Yeah, I guess.”
“Would you say that counts as ‘emotional value?’”
“Definitely, to them at least.”
“So then people follow you because they perceive value in what you offer, interacting with your page, and being associated with you somehow, even if it’s just to hate on, yes?”
“Yeah.”
“And what did we say earlier about your attitude towards providing value?”
“That I haven’t been doing nearly as good a job at it as I think, or as my heroes did when they were getting started, and that I had a pretty entitled attitude towards it all.”
“Harsh, but true. So what can you expect from such an approach?”
“I can expect followers to gain slowly.”
“Spot on. And how could you change this?”
“I could polish my brand, create more of my most popular content, aim to provide more value, maybe hotter shots, *collaborate* with better photographers, hold contests, offer live chats, etcetera.”
“Indeed. And just like Jay Z manually handed out CDs from the back of his van at the mall, is there a simple, ‘manual’ task you could do that makes people on Instagram happy and brings them value?”
“Um, besides posting photos?”
“Yes.”
“I don’t think so.”
“Well, when someone leaves a comment on your IG posts, what’s the first thing you do?”
“Reply to them?”
“Nope, before you reply, you do something else.”
“I do?”
“Yep. What do your eyes do before you even start typing?”
“Ohhh, look at their profile pic.”
“Mmmhmm, and what do you do with that profile pic?”
“Oh snap, if it looks good, I often click on it!”
“So then, reverse it. What would happen if you commented on another model’s post? What would they do?”
“They’d look at my profile pic, and probably click on it.”
“And so your single-comment gets a stranger who’s never heard of you, to check out your profile, yes?”
“Yes.”
“And is it just one, or do many other people who view the post also see the comment you made and profile pic?”
“Many others do too. Oh emm gee, maybe that’s why I see so many big-name models and bimbos leaving one-line comments on other people’s posts!”
“Yep, because they know leaving comments is valuable, and generates an abundance of strangers checking out their profile that they couldn’t have reached otherwise. They care about their reach, and like Jay Z with his CDs, were willing to do the legwork with a happy heart, and no ‘real’ agenda. They know people can ignore their comment or not click through, and they’re fine with that too.”
“Wow. And I thought all my other ideas were powerful, but look at the power of a simple kind word to others!”
“Right, and if you made comments, or did some of your other ideas with a full heart, happily serving up value to others (even to your haters), without judgment, entitlement, or agenda… do you honestly think your follower-count wouldn’t skyrocket?”
“No, you’re right, my follower-count would definitely skyrocket if I did that stuff.”
“See? Gaining fans and making money is easy, you just haven’t been approaching it properly. Imagine if you were selling calendars.”
“Hell no, I already failed at selling calendars… hard.”
“You did?”
“Yeah, my NFT project was actually twelve separate tokens, one for each calendar page.”
“Well, that’s fine, after all we’ve talked about, I have two questions. One: Do you truly believe you approached selling calendars correctly, with a value-for-others mindset, or were you simply focused on making money for your self, and Two: what are we supposed to do with failure?”
“The answer to the first question is I totally wasn’t focused on value-for-others, so yes it was destined to fail, and the answer to the second, is we’re supposed to learn from failure and keep moving forward like Edison because we believe in our project, not just abandon it.”
“Well said. And what did we learn from the first NFT attempt?”
“That men are jerks and aren’t interested in a bimbo who’s creative? That I’m just supposed to look pretty and earn nothing?”
“Tut, tut, sounds like more bad beliefs popping up.”
“Well you’re a man, you wouldn’t understand, this stuff never happens to guys.”
“Annnnnd voila, Emma delivers yet another bad belief that will hold back your wealth and dreams. My, my, you’re putting on a clinic on how to limit yourself, my dear.”
“How does being mean and hurting my self-esteem teach me anything?! You’re the worst teacher ever.”
Emma stormed off.
I sighed. Oh well, at least I could finally eat my sandwich.
***
Emma was apologizing, and we were back in the kitchen, “I’m sorry I stormed off.”
“When? Yesterday, or the last ten times I’ve tried to teach you something important?”
Emma gritted her teeth. “All of them, but especially yesterday. I know you pour your heart into teaching important lessons, and I know you were just speaking the truth. I do have more bad beliefs and I let them trigger me and I felt defensive and attacked, and I blamed you for it.”
“Thank you for saying so.”
“And I’m sorry.”
“No apologies necessary, just do better, stop being triggered, and stop making our conversations so dramatic, please and thank you.”
“I will, promise. Do you mind picking up where we left off?”
“Oh, where you were telling me my teachings were trash and I couldn’t possibly understand how a woman can successfully sell things because I’m a man?”
“Uh, well, yeah, but… you don’t have to be mean about it.”
“Ok, ok, that time I was being mean, my bad, and I apologize and will do better. But you do see how what you said before storming off is basically sexist against men, right? If I said ‘I can’t learn anything from a woman, because she’s not my gender’, people would go nuts.”
“Yeah, yeah, I know. Of course you can teach me how to sell stuff successfully. And having experienced sexism much of my life, I definitely don’t want to dish it out towards others, especially my wonderful Dad.”
“I appreciate it. And you know that I’ve helped your Mom with her business, Cassie with her fundraising, and many models in my ‘past life’ as a retoucher and life-coach, right?”
“I do. I just wanted something to blame for my NFT failures. Sexism seemed like low-hanging fruit, so I grabbed at it. I know you’re a wise dude, and I’m eager to hear anything you have for me. Please go ahead.”
“Fine. So. Do you know what Marilyn Monroe did when ‘The Big 5’ male-run Hollywood Studios wouldn’t take her seriously?”
“No…”
“Instead of whining that ‘men are bad’ and ‘achieving my dream is impossible ‘cause…men’, Marilyn broke her contract and accepted the penalties and lawsuits, moved to New York, and started making a name for herself there. She kept actively seeking out connections until she found people (including men, gasp!) who believed in her. Then she started one of the first women-owned production companies.”
“Women in business are so inspiring.”
“Careful, sweetie. Any successful business person should inspire you and be someone worth learning from. But yes, Marilyn is definitely inspiring. Let’s look at someone else. Sara Blakley, founder of Spanx says:
‘The biggest hurdles for me as a woman in business were also my greatest strengths — and that was being underestimated.’
And do you know what Sara did when the men in fifty manufacturing plants rejected or hung up on her?”
“Nuh-uh.”
“She kept up with the ‘hundred-for-one’ rule, calling every hosiery mill in North Carolina. They all said no. So she decided to patent her idea, but there was no female patent-attorney in the state of Georgia. Did she bemoan the sexist state of the world? Nope. She cold called law firms and pitched male attorneys on patenting it.
It was too expensive, so she proceeded to start doing the patent work herself. Because she believed in her idea enough to fully commit to it, and did allll this legwork, eventually one of the male attorneys came around, impressed with her, and helped her out. Sara embraced being ignored, she embraced rejection, she embraced the lack of sales,. believed the right people were out there who’d buy-in.”
“Brilliant woman.”
“Indeed, but let’s be honest, did you treat your Calendar the way Sara treated her ‘footless pantyhose’ idea?”
“Not at all.”
“And did Sara use the argument ‘men don’t get me’ as an excuse to stop trying, stop believing?”
“Definitely not.”
“So do you believe that if you modeled Sara’s approach, truly believed in your calendars, and kept on hustling them to anyone you could, you’d eventually find the right people to buy them?”
“Yes, I do.”
“So would you say ‘my NFT project failed because people don’t want creative bimbos’, or would you say ‘it’s a big world and the right buyers are out there, I just didn’t put nearly enough belief and dedication into marketing my project?’”
“The latter.”
“And with what we’ve covered here together, do you think you could ‘make’ your project earn well with a different approach?”
“Yes, I believe my calendars are awesome, and I could totally Sara Blakely the shit out of em!”
“Em! Language! For Pete’s sake.”
“Oh c’mon Dad, we all hear worse than that on TV and movies every day.”
She had a point. Why was I still holding onto this weird belief that my kids shouldn’t swear? Whatever, I’d address it later. “Just hush with that, please.”
Emma stuck her tongue out, but agreed. “OK, but can I get more money-making ideas from you please?”
“Sure, have you bothered to learn any copywriting?”
“What? Of course not, my fans are here for boobs, not words.”
“That may be true, but that doesn’t mean words aren’t powerful or have no impact. Words are one of the most persuasive tools any human being has, and you’ve been using them to ‘sell’ since you were a toddler. Copywriters are just people who use words better than most people.”
“Well I’ve written some pieces on the blockchain before, but my pics and reels get way more engagement.”
“Sure, but would your pics and reels crush even harder, and move more fans to take action and buy your stuff, if you employed some copywriting chops and persuasion techniques in your captions? You said you wanted to make *more* money, not scrape by on what your poorly-captioned photos alone can earn, right?”
“True.”
“Well, copywriting uses one of the most powerful and oldest forms of communication on the planet.”
“What’s that?”
“Storytelling, which, come to think of it — even predates writing. I’m talking about word-paintings that move people to take specific action, which is ultimately, what you want your fans to do, right?”
“One hundred percent. Specifically, I want them to buy, ell oh ell.”
“Well empathetic, engaging, and thought-provoking copywriting is an essential part of any business today, and for the foreseeable future. It comes first — before branding, before marketing, before design, before content strategy and even before your sales team.
Because those other departments can’t function properly without a copywriter to nail down the messaging behind the business, the product, the campaign, and the marketing materials they need to effectively do their jobs.
Your photos will move almost no one towards the action you want them to take, if you’re unable to communicate what you want them to do in a way that moves them.”
“This sounds hard.”
“It’s really not, it just takes a bit of practice. Even the founder of Mindvalley, Vishen Lakhiani —who studied computer programming in college— learned copywriting to get his business off the ground. Copywriting is the difference between writing:
‘Delicious Crispy Potato Spirals From A Korean Recipe.’
And:
‘Can These Korean Potato-Spirals HYPNOTIZE Your Tastebuds?’
Both sentences are about the same length, each uses simple words, and both sentences could be written by you… but only one of these sentences will truly move people to click.”
“Wow.”
“Yeah, there’s a reason why the best copywriters can charge thousands of dollars for a single sales page. Because they make their clients crazy amounts of money just by pouring love into their words. Let’s open up your Instagram and see if we can tweak a sentence to get you more OnlyFans subscribers.”
“Awesome!”
Emma whipped out her pink iPhone and loaded her Instagram bio. It said: ‘Model, Dancer, Singer. Actress. Half-Latina. Click here for my horniness and other projects.’
“Now, I know you don’t know all the persuasion techniques, or copywriting tricks yet, but do you think this is a compelling bio?”
“Well, it tells all the important stuff about me, so maybe?”
“C’mon Em. What if less is more? What if your message could be clearer. What if your words could be catchier? Couldn’t this be more ‘clickable’?”
“You’re right, but I don’t want to be a copywriter.”
“Fine, then flash some skin, flirt, and trade photos or something to hire one, because I guarantee you, the successful bimbos you look up to either knew how to write a decent caption or bio, or they got someone to do it for them. Ane even if they’re not ‘writing’ exactly, they’ve learned what persuasive things to *say* on camera or in their reels, or whatever.”
“As usual, I’m tempted to argue, but as usual, you’re probably right.”
“Facts. So if you’re trying to succeed as a bimbo/model, do you really need all the other professions tossed in there?”
“But I really am open to doing all those things.”
“I know dear, but when Marilyn Monroe was starting out and building a following, do you think she told everyone ‘I’m a, b, c, x, y, and z’ each time she talked to people? Or do you think she just focused on one career at a time, saying ‘I’m a model who’s blowing up’ to start?”
“Likely the latter. So do you think my bio would do better if it just said ‘Bimbo Model?’”
“I do. And not only that, Instagram bios have very limited amounts of characters allowed, so trimming down your professions allows you to inject juicier calls to action and directions to your fans.”
“That’s true, I never thought about that.”
“No, but a decent copywriter would, so you’re learning.”
“What if your bio said something more like this:
‘(Half-) Latina Barbie.
Get closer to me and fulfill your naughtiest dreams by clicking the link below. (Free bonus for anyone who finds me on ‘that other site’.)’
Do you see how this adds intrigue and enticement? Do you see how it speaks to your fans core values and what they’re really hoping to do? Do you see how it generously promises them something special for making it to your OnlyFans?”
“Yes, they do want to get closer to me, they do want free bonuses, and they do want to fulfill their… um… arousal. God I still can’t believe I’m talking to my Dad about this stuff.”
“Even after our giant bimbo chat last month about you pursuing bimbohood as a career?”
“Yeah, I mean… like… it’s so surreal.”
“Suck it up, buttercup. I had to when you first brought all this stuff up.”
“Fair point…
OK, what if I just want a sugar-daddy pay for my new bimbofication aesthetic, my look?”
“That’s totally doable, but it still won’t be an ‘easy out’ that you might think. You still must provide value, emotional, physical, or otherwise, for a sugar-daddy to be inspired to invest in you. Guys don’t just go around investing in lard-ass couch-potatoes with zero ambition who deliver nothing but drama to their lives.”
“Hey, language!”
“You’re unreal. I’ll put a dollar in the swear-jar. Anyway, can you honestly say your low-gratitude, entitled behavior is going to attract a man to invest in you?”
Emma just grumbled.
“Can you honestly say that you’ve demonstrated you’re a valuable woman, worth investing in?”
“Well, I have a successful modeling career, and I’ve bimbo’d it up a bit lately…”
“Sure, but there’s plenty of models with 10,000 followers out there to compete with. Many are looking for boyfriends to pay for their surgeries too. Can you honestly say you stand out?”
“Hmmm. This is definitely food for thought.”
“Yes, and what are you offering? Is your value clear? Are you going to um, trade your body, for surgeries? If so, just how… far are you willing to go?” I did *not* like thinking about my daughter being uber-kinky, but I had to make my point.
“Good point, perhaps the farther I’m willing to go or the kinkier I’m willing to be, the more appealing it is?”
“Maybe, maybe not. Though to be clear, I am definitely not suggesting you do that, or go that route. I highly recommend using the other money-making tips I’ve offered. Please.”
“Haha, relax Dad, I’m not going full-on hooker-mode just to get bigger boobs. I’ll try your other ways first for sure. And besides, like you said in our last talk, maybe I can achieve what I want naturally anyway, but I’d still need money for hormones, herbs, and clothes. The boob-job thing was just an example I gave when I was feeling un-abundant.”
“Good. And sometimes just making an emotional connection, or satisfying one guy’s particular foot-fetish, is enough to secure investment. My overall point though, is that money is still a side-effect of serving up value, whether you’re serving it up to many fans, or one wealthy sugar-daddy.”
“I get that. I’ll sleep on it. And at this point, I’ve changed so many of my bad beliefs about money, it’s probably best if I go work on all this stuff and practice, before I make big decisions.”
“Very wise, honeybear. But that reminds me, before you go, there’s one more thing I’d like to teach you.”
“What’s that?”
“You absolutely, positively, must decide to embody and express abundance.”
“Oh, I did that ages ago.”
“No, you definitely did not.”
“What? You can’t read minds now? How do you know?”
“Because if you did, we wouldn’t have even had this conversation.”
“Someone who decides to be a living incarnation of abundance won’t dip into ingratitude. They won’t storm off when learning abundance. They won’t resist learning copywriting basics to persuade others. Someone who has decided, truly, deep-down, on a gut-level is different from someone who says they’ve decided.
They’re different from someone who intellectually thinks they’ve decided. They are someone who oozes abundance in all they do. They pursue their craft with a fun, light heart. They welcome challenges. They fear no rejection. They believe in their offering and take every ‘no’ as a sign that they’re one step closer to a ‘yes’ from the right people.
It’s not hard to spot someone who’s truly decided to be successful. And although you haven’t decided this in the past, even if you think you did, it’s never too late to do so.”
“Wow. That’s hardcore, but it makes a lot of sense. I’ve said I’m successful, even doing affirmations about it. I’ve thought I’ve chosen success, even though it’s just an intellectual. But you’re right, I’ve never truly chosen to embody abundance, deep in my gut, with that burning commitment to it like I did when I chose to break up with Dylan.”
“Exactly, if you don’t have that same fiery ‘click’ within you like you did when you dumped Dylan for real, you haven’t actually decided to be abundant.”
“This. Is. A. Freakin’. Game-Changer.”
“It really is, and sadly, no other teacher I know teaches it.”
“I just did it. I just felt it. I fuh–er—freaking know I decided to be successful now.”
“I hope so.”
“I did!”
“I believe you, but we’ll see the truth by how you conduct yourself, how you practice, how you apply yourself going forward. If you’ve truly decided it, you absolutely will make money, and better than most people imagine, even if it doesn’t happen immediately.”
“I’m psyched.”
“Get out there and make your money, my darling.”
Fin.
—
Moving towards a bimbofication aesthetic can be costly, but it doesn’t have to be unattainable.
This was just a story to help illustrate why so many bimbos have difficulty acquiring funds for their bimbofication. It was inspired by a wonderful budding bimbo who was eager to make more money, but wasn’t really open to my direct advice, so I figured I’d share what I could here, in story form.
It’s not a full guide, and it doesn’t address every limiting belief possible, but I love seeing budding bimbos achieve their dreams, and I poured a lot of love into writing this. Hopefully you’re open-minded and creative enough to understand the examples, messages, and morals. Hopefully you can apply what’s being taught here to your own life.
Making money has been done by millions of people for millennia, and you can certainly be one of them. Either way, wishing you lots of joy and success. #KeepRyzing !
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