How To
Be A Bimbo

The Ultimate Guide To Bimbofication: Emma's Story

Emma awkwardly tells her Dad she wants to be a bimbo, with shocking results.

Bimbo Belle Cassidy Outback Barbie

Have you ever felt jealous of an Instagram bimbo?

Ever wanted to taste a life like that? Or maybe you secretly just want to ‘slut it up’ a bit? Or have bigger boobs? Or more daring tats? Or maybe you just want to study the bimbo-aesthetic for kicks.

Well, whether you’re a beginner bimbo who wants to ditch ‘daytime’ makeup & fashion rules, or one who’s already part-way through her bimbofication journey… you’ve just found the most comprehensive guide on how to be a bimbo.

Oh, and this whole ‘how to be a bimbo’ guide is also a fun little story of Emma and her Dad.

Read Emma’s story below.

"Why were you so afraid to tell me, Emma?"

My daughter Emma and I were in the upstairs hall having a rather delicate discussion.

I know, I know.

The hall is a weird place for a chat, but it was late and we were both getting ready to sleep, and…

…that’s just how things worked out.

Emma replied, “Because there’s so much judgment and stigma about being a bimbo, I figured you and Mom would hate me for it.”

“Aw, honey, why would you think that?”

“Because of society. Because of what’s ‘acceptable.’ Because of the media. Because when I told Mia she was all like ‘what the hell Em! A bimbo? That’s gross and slutty and you’re undoing decades of feminism.’ She eventually came around to my side but only after –like– a month of us fighting.”

“Oh my sweet girl. You’ve always been into modeling, femininity, and ‘girly’ things, we knew you’d probably go this route before you even did. We’re your parents and we support whatever your dreams are, whether they’re brief experiments like your ‘glasses phase’ or full commitments like your ‘influencer’ career.”

“Awww, I love you both, you’re the best.”

“Our pleasure, honey. So now that you’ve admitted your ‘bimbo dreams’ to yourself and us, what did you *really* want to ask me?”

“Well, you’ve always taught me better than any professor or book I’ve ever come across, so I was hoping you could teach me…

How To Be A Bimbo!"

“Ah. Hmm. Well, this isn’t a normal thing for a father to teach his daughter—”

“But Dad—”

“—but bimbo-ism is trending lately, and you’re a smart girl who knows what she wants, so the least I can do is help you reach your goals. So sure, count me in.”

“OMG thank you! First question, where do I start?”

“Well, although I pride myself on my wisdom and intelligence, I will have to do my own ‘bimbo research’ and get back to you before we dive into all your questions.”

“That’s fair, but can’t you give me something to go on? I’m so psyched to get started and you always know something useful!”

“OK, well, most bimbo-resources will tell you to start with make-up, or fashion, or plastic surgery or something, and although they mean well, they’re basically wrong.”


“Because you want to start with the root of anything. And the roots of all change are the intangible things that drive it. Things like: vision, emotion, and immersion.”

“Hmm. I know how to start with a ‘vision’ in my imagination, but I’m not too clear on how to start with ‘emotion’ or ‘immersion.’”

“That’s fine, just start with what you know, go and come up with your ‘bimbo vision’ anyway, and while you’re doing that I’ll compile a mini ‘course curriculum’ for bimbo-wannabes, and we’ll explore it together tomorrow.”


Ask yourself why you want to be a bimbo.

The sun was shining, breakfast was done, and I was nursing an extra mug of coffee as I relaxed on our giant plush blue-steel rocking chair. Emma was fidgeting on the matching couch next to me.

I slurped my drink to get her attention in a playfully obnoxious way.

“OMG, I get it, Dad. Let’s continue our chat! I’m so excited to show you what I came up with for my bimbo vision.”

“I’m happy to hear it, Em, but before we do, I’d like to hear your reasons for wanting to be a ‘bimbo.’ There’s no ‘wrong reason’ for wanting to explore this, but some motivations are less satisfying, positive, or strong than others, so it’s worth taking a look at yours.”

“Can’t I just say it’s ‘because I want to’? Do my dreams and desires have to have a ‘why’?”

“Technically yes, but most of the time that’s a lazy answer from someone who refuses to take an honest look at themselves and their reasons for doing things.

Bimboism is a very controversial area, so I’d say it’s a fair request to have you dig deeper and be honest about your true motivations.

Are you doing it to impress a boy? Because of peer pressure? Because of a life-long dream? As an experiment? Because it seems fun? To get attention? To make money? Or even –I can’t believe I’m even saying these words– get a sugar-daddy?”


Bimbo Soap Bottle

I’ll tell you why I want to be a bimbo.

It’s like you said yesterday, I’ve always loved feminine things.

I’ve always loved physical beauty.

And although some of my modeling & acting friends are pretty enough, I just have a desire to be more, to be ‘better’ at femininity, to take it further and show the world something new.

It feels like we live in a hyper-masculine society focused on the economy, politics, and utilitarian ‘concrete jungles’, where people who are focused on playfulness and beauty are shunned. I want to be a new kind of role model for what’s possible. I want to be a bright, vibrant, feminine light in such a dark world.

The word ‘slut’ used to be derogatory but Amber Rose’s slutwalk and other women have helped reclaim the word, making it more positive.

I want to help do the same thing for the word ‘bimbo.’

The only way to stop society from shaming girly-girls is to lead by example and normalize it.”

“Wow. That is… not what I was expecting, though I probably should’ve, my dear. We raised you well and that’s a fantastic reason for wanting to be a bimbo.”

“Thank you, I really meant it! Mia tried to convince me that I was just ‘pandering to the male gaze,’ but I told her I’ve dreamed of being like Marilyn Monroe or Pamela Anderson since before puberty. Ten-year-old me didn’t give an eff about the male gaze, and neither does current me.

If guys desire me as a side-effect of my bimbo-dreams, so be it, but I know who I am and what I’m about, and our power-hungry, hyper-capitalist world could use a boost in playful bimbosity. Facts.”

“It’d be amazing if more people had your attitude on this. And by the way, that’s the first time I’ve heard you use the word ‘utilitarian’, where did you learn it?”

“I came across it while I was putting my bimbo-vision together yesterday, and I felt like it fit, so I used it.

Speaking of my bimbo-vision, can I show it to you now?”

“By all means.”

Emma handed me her phone, and I tapped the screen. It revealed a heavily photoshopped version of my daughter with more extreme curves, smoother complexion, exaggerated facial features, vibrant-yet-feminine makeup, and…


Some of the sluttiest clothes I’d ever seen.

As far as I knew, Em only had average Photoshop skills, but this was impressive.

“Wow, Emma, this is an incredible amount of work, and you’ve clearly poured a lot of time, energy, and thought into this.”

“Yes! I’d been thinking about it for months, and I already had a bunch of folders on my phone with pics of different body parts and fashions that I liked.

I just sent them to Brian, one of my retouchers, and asked him to Photoshop it all together for me. See why I was so excited? He did an amazing job, I look so beautiful! It’s pure art!”

“Well, my love, I’m not sure it’s the exact aesthetic I’d want for my daughter, but I can see how it would make you stand out as a model and influencer, and I can see how happy it makes you, and that’s what matters.

And you’re right, this is an incredible piece of art, Brian obviously went the extra mile for you!”

“He totally did!”

“So, is there something between you and this… Brian?”

“Ugh! No, Dad, Brian’s gay. And way too much of a diva for me, even if he wasn’t. C’mon, can we focus?

“Sorry, sorry, just Dad things. Anyway, you’ve done an amazing first step here. I encourage anyone who wants to ‘become’ something, to immerse themselves in that world, collect pictures and inspirations from it.

Even put them together into a ‘vision-board’ or ‘mood-board’ of how they’d like to be or look. It seems like you’ve been doing that for months and did an excellent job of it.”

“Thank you.” Emma half-bowed on the couch with a grand flourish. “So what’s next?”

“Next you practice getting the emotion of whatever you want to become. We’ll do a little emotional exercise.

Bimbo - Feeling 1080

What does being a bimbo feel like?”

“Uh, I dunno. Fun I guess?”

“And what else?”

“Well, it feels beautiful!”

“More specifically?”

“It feels like I’m a princess of femininity!”

“Can you take it further?”

“It feels like I’m a goddess, envied and lusted after by many, buzzed about by society and the media, a walking, talking, work of art that lights up rooms and creates waves wherever I go.”

“There we go. Can you feel the difference in your emotion when you started, and your emotion at the end of our exercise?”

“I totally can!”

“And did it take actual effort to achieve this emotional state?”

“Yes, I had to dig deep and feel it in my body. My first answer didn’t really spark an emotion. Your questions helped a lot.”

“Right, and can you only tap into these emotions when I’m around, asking questions, or can you tap into them whenever you want?”

“I can tap into them whenever I want. I could ask myself these questions, or even dress up in bimbo clothes and I’d probably start feeling them even more.”

“Exactly. This is what I meant when I said that before you start any transformation journey, it’s vital to get clear on your vision, summon aligned emotion, and immerse yourself in that world.”

“Did I do that last one?

Have I properly immersed myself in the bimbo world?”

“Maybe, maybe not.

How much do you know about the bimbo world? Do you know where bimbos hang out? Do you know what brands they shop? What bimboization methods do they use? And so on?”

“Not really, I know a little bit, but mostly just know that I want to be one.”

“Right, so I’ve probably done more of that last one than you have, haha. I spent all day yesterday immersed in the bimbo-world doing crazy amounts of research.

But don’t worry, we’ll help immerse you in the bimbo-world together, and then your change will really kick into gear.”

“Why is immersion so important?”

“Because every hobby or skill or experience you want to have has its own language. If you suddenly had the dream of becoming a great archer, your journey wouldn’t really start until you learned what arm-guards, vanes, and thumb-releases are.”


“Exactly, you haven’t even dipped your toe in the waters of archery, let alone immersed yourself in archery. If you had a dream to be a successful game designer, your journey wouldn’t really start until you learned who Sid Meier, John Romero, and Gabe Newell are.”


“Exactly, you don’t even recognize some of the most inspirational and pioneering game designers earth has to offer, so it’s clear you’ve not immersed yourself in game design.

Same goes for bimbofication.

If you truly want to be a bimbo, you need to immerse yourself in the world of bimbos, learning the language, studying the pioneers and personalities, and more.”

“Well, I know Aletta Ocean is probably the most famous ‘modern-day’ bimbo, and I don’t want to be exactly like her, but she’s made a huge splash and is really inspiring. And I know Anna-Nicole Smith and Marilyn Monroe were early pioneers.”

“Right, but did you know some believe Cleopatra was a bimbo?”

“I thought she was an Egyptian queen? Didn’t she like, lead an army or something?”

Some people believe she was a bimbo-queen, and one of the earliest ‘bimbo pioneers.’ At least, that’s what I discovered when I immersed myself in the world of bimbos.

I also discovered that there are a significant number of men who want to be bimbos.

In fact, there may even be more of them than women interested in the topic.”

“Are you serious?!”

“Yep, there’s a passionate transgender community who are into bimboization, and they even teach how to be a bimbo for assigned-male-at-birth folk. Ultimately, although to bimbos started out as a fairly ‘westernized’ aesthetic…

Bimbo Influencer - Collage

There are bimbos of every size, shape, and ethnicity.”

“Really? I thought they were all blonde-haired, blue-eyed, fair-skinned princesses.”

“Hardly. I mean sure, there’s bimbo-dolls similar to what you describe, such as Barbie Angelic, but there’s also everything else you can imagine.

There’s darker-complexioned bimbos like Monifa Jansen and Lexxie Marie. There’s latina bimbos like Maria Florencia Chilo. Toochi Kash is a blend of Cuban, Egyptian, and Lebanese. Yvonne Bar is apparently a Christian bimbo. Aditi Mistry is Indian. Alena Omovych is Ukrainian. Xena Kai is Filipino. Jojo Babie is Laosian. Mackenzee Pierce is Native American.

There’s even goth bimbos –which are two things you might not think go together– like Dani Divine or Morgana Threnody.

You might even put someone like Cupcakke into the ‘plus-size bimbo’ category. Interestingly…

You’d know all this if you’d immersed yourself in the bimbo world.

Do you see how ‘having a dream’ is different from ‘plunging deep into the waters of your dream?’

“Yeah, obviously I’ve played too small here, and I should be really immersing myself in bimbodom. How did you do it?”

“It’s not magic, I just google.”

“That’s it?”

“Yep, but I don’t google like an average chump. I don’t just use normal googling, I don’t just google once or twice, then give up.

I buckle down, focus, and really leverage google well. Every time I fail a search, I use it as fuel to refine and search even better.

I never get impatient or discouraged if my searches don’t deliver instant results, and I’m grateful for every failed search because it teaches me what not to search for.”

“What do you do if a search is a dead end?”

“That’s my point, a search is never a dead-end. It’s always data. It’s always helpful. It always tells you either

a) you’re searching in the wrong direction, time to adjust, or

b) you’re searching in the right direction, time to refine even further.”

“For example?”

“Say I search ‘bimbofication’, and all the results are just fluff memes that teach me nothing.”

“That’s actually happened to me, so I just gave up and went to the mall with Mia.”

“Right, but I’d be thrilled that my search failed, and next time I’d search ‘bimbofication -meme’, and by adding the phrase ‘-meme’ I’ve told google I want to know everything about bimbofication but exclude anything mentioning the phrase ‘meme.’

My first failed search made my second search way better. Sometimes, if my search is failing a lot, I use to search for bimbofication stuff, because google seems to censor many things bimbo-related. It’s actually way better.”

“OK, well what if I wanted to find bimbo communities but my search turned up nothing?”

“Again, I’d be happy for my failed search because it’s telling me I’m not searching for the correct phrases. I assume you searched for ‘bimbo community’ or ‘bimbofication community’ and found nothing, right?”

“Yep! I just found a bunch of articles talking about how bimbos are having a resurgence in our communities and societies, lately.”

“So, we’ll keep the word ‘bimbofication’ , let’s say, but it seems the word ‘community’ is confusing google, right?”

“Yes, it seems that way.”

“So we alter the word ‘community’ to be more specific, and we search for ‘bimbofication subreddit’, and voila, we’ve found one bimbo community already. Then we type ‘bimbofication discord server’ and voila, we’ve found another bimbo community already.

It literally took me one failed search, and one amended search, a total of 30 seconds of effort and I’ve found my bimbo communities.”

“So this is how you immerse yourself and learn any skill or identity that you want, fast?”

“Yep, that’s it. Just googling with an open mind, a loving heart, and lots of gratitude replacing impatience and discouragement.”

“Wow, this might be the most helpful skill anyone’s ever taught me. This turns google into an ‘instant answer’ button, I wish school taught us this. I’ve got a lot of googling to do.”

“So does anyone who wants to transform, learn new skills, or become a new person. But before you run off, maybe I can save you some time, since I did most of the immersion myself already.”

“That’d be great, thank you. Does this mean we finally get to the plastic surgery, makeup and fashion stuff?”

“Hold your horses miss, we’re getting there. Of course that stuff is important, but it’s kind of like the final coat of paint on a house.

Building proper foundations, having reliable plumbing, and other internal things are key.

Adding a coat of paint or a fancy LED address that visitors marvel over comes later.”

“What do you mean ‘internal’ things?”

“Well, for example, if you engage the bimbo community, throwing around the term ‘bimbofication’, do you even know what message you’re sending?”

“I mean, it seems obvious I’m talking about ‘becoming a bimbo’, right?”

“Perhaps. But…

Did you know there are multiple definitions of the word ‘bimbo?’

“Uhh, pretty sure ‘bimbo’ means ‘bimbo’, y’know?”

“Well, some people use the word ‘bimbofication’ to mean a sexual kink or fantasy or roleplay of being a slutty, hypersexual airhead…

…while others use it to simply mean becoming hyperfeminine or experiencing a glamorous ‘glow up?’

The whole time we’ve been talking about this, I’ve assumed you meant the latter, not that my daughter is literally asking me for help on how to sleep around and become some kind of depraved hypersexual ‘town bicycle.’”

“Yikes. My bad. I didn’t know there were two meanings. I mostly meant the second one, I just wanna be hyper-feminine, dress more provocatively, get more attention on social, and turn up my modeling career.”

“Well, my definition of a bimbo is: Anyone sincerely applying themselves (in ways that suit them) towards (their version of) hyperfemininity.”

“Well, I may play around with a bit of air-headedness and a more playful life, but don’t worry Dad, you won’t find me on a porn set or escorting anytime soon.”

“Well, I’d…uh… support you either way, I guess, but thank god you’re not headed that direction.

I’m pretty liberal and stuff, but hearing that is still a relief.

Anyway, my point is internal things like ‘bimbo politics’ or the meaning of certain words need to be straightened out in your heart and mind, before you go bimboizing yourself.

You may want to know whether you’re ‘deliberately’ offending ‘feminists,’ involving yourself in sexual promiscuitiy, and all sorts of other things each time you make a bimbo-related choice.”

“Ah, this is what you meant by internal things it’d good to clarify before I get to the ‘final coat of paint.’ I think I get it now.”

“You do, eh? Then tell me…

What are some ‘internal’ things to know about bimbofication?”

“Well, I probably need to get clear on some internal things about how to be a bimbo, like…

How ‘extreme’ I want my bimbofication to be?

Do I want be sexually promiscuous or just hyperfeminine?

Do I want it to be more of an attitude, or just appearance only?

If I go airhead, how ‘dumb’ do I want to play it?

Shall I be a ‘natural’ bimbo, ‘fifty-percent plastic’, or go ‘complete silicone.’

Does bimbo mean I'm ‘leftist’, or is it separate from politics?

And I need to decide if I’ll retain my ‘smarts’ most of the time, or truly become ’empty-headed.’ And does it matter how ‘inclusive’ my bimbo-ism is?

These questions, I think, are what you mean by important ‘internal’ things to consider before we get to the fun makeup, fashion, and body-transformation stuff.”

“Ah, I love it. Yes, you really do get it. If you’re not clear on this stuff, you won’t have a good internal compass, map, or path to navigate your ‘bimbo’ journey, and you’ll end up in some pretty dark places.

Being a bimbo is a high-risk (judgment, dismissal, being targeted, being outcast), high-reward lifestyle.

If you’re going to embrace it, you’ll need to be mentally and emotionally ready for the situations that can come along with it.”

“That makes total sense. I’ve seen bimbos who don’t have a solid internal foundation.

I’ve seen bimbos who just dive into their glow up and end up getting overwhelmed by the media, society, fans, haters, and all kinds of weird situations that their look gets them into.”

“Exactly, and obviously I want better than that for my children.”

“Thanks Dad. I appreciate it. But let’s say I’ve got my head on straight and I’m fine to navigate the minefield of a bimbo in society today.

Let’s say I’m clear on my choices and what I stand for, and I’m ready for anyone to try and call me out on this stuff. Now, can we talk about physical transformation?”

“We can, but you’d still be skipping an important part of transforming yourself.”

“Like what?”

“Emotion, energy, and attitude.”


“Bimbos are hyperfeminine, right?”

“Right, so?”

“So to be hyperfeminine, you have to…

Understand which traits are feminine, and which are not.”

“Oh, like feminine people are ‘delicate’ while masculine people are ‘strong’?”

“That’s one example, yes.

And that one is another minefield, because many people would rage and ‘cancel’ you for labeling ‘strength’ as ‘masculine.’”

“Yeah, they’ll be all like: ‘Uh, hello? Women are the strongest! What are you talking about? It’s so insulting to call women weak. Strength is *not* a masculine trait, how dare you!’

“Yes, many people are just looking for an excuse to be triggered, and a movement that focuses heavily on femininity, like bimboism, is bound to trigger a lot of people who enjoy getting riled up about that subject.”

“I feel like people who get triggered are people who don’t have a full understanding of femininity in general.”

“You’re correct, they usually don’t, but then, who among us does have a full understanding of it?

And even if you know more than they do, are you going to have a nice civil debate with them, convince them of their misunderstandings, and enlighten them with deep truths about masculine, feminine, yin, yang, and the nature of the universe…

…all while they’re in the middle of canceling you?”

“Ah, probably not, no.”

“Bingo. So you’re on a mission to physically embody feminine energy, feminine qualities, and feminine traits. And by doing this, you’re probably going to ruffle some feathers, so you’ll need to have firm internal ground on the topic of feminine energy.

So, can you tell me how feminine energy animates and expresses itself in certain traits and qualities?”

“Ummm, being pretty and stuff?”

“Feminine energy does lean towards ‘form’ over ‘function’, yes.

Though again, many would love to argue with you about this, despite it being obvious in mother nature, as well as civilization, since caveman times. What else?”

“Errr, being nurturing? Like taking care of kids?”

“Good one, yes, most people can understand that nurturing and mothering a child is a distinctly feminine quality or energy, but again, you’ll meet people with strong agendas to have it reclassified as masculine or neutral.”

“That’s silly.”

“Yeah, but to each their own, we can wish them luck with their crusade. Anything else?”

“Uh oh. That’s basically all I can think of.”

“Haha, that’s ok, lots of people think they understand masculine and feminine on an instinctual level, but rarely do they consciously study it, analyze it, and understand the interplay of these two polarities and how the universe always maintains a balance between them.

I’ll give you a hand, let’s see if your instincts kick in properly.”


"Let's play the feminine traits game."

"Sounds fun! How do I play?"

“Take a deep breath, open your heart, open your mind, and get ready to give the most honest, instinctual answers from your gut that you can, ready?”


Word one: ‘surrender’, masculine or feminine?”


‘Radiance’, masculine or feminine?”


‘Flow’, masculine or feminine?”


‘Discipline’, masculine or feminine?”


‘Sensuality’, masculine or feminine?”

“Girly AF.”

‘Logic’, masculine or feminine?”


‘Connection’, masculine or feminine?”


‘Awareness’, masculine or feminine?”


“See? You could only think of two traits that you considered feminine at the start, ‘beauty’ and ‘nurturing’, but instinctively you really do know which qualities are masculine and which are feminine.

You got every single one ‘right.'”

“You made air-quotes because there’s no truly conclusive proof any trait is actually ‘masculine’ or ‘feminine’, didn’t you?”

“Yeah, I mean, I’m pretty sure everyone can instinctively feel the polarities of the universe and can spot feminine or masculine traits, but I still make allowances for anyone who wants to see them differently.”


“Thanks. But the question is, how good are you at feminine qualities like these?”

“I mean, I’m a girly model connecting with decent-sized audiences on the ‘gram, so I’d say I’m pretty good, right?”

“Well, you’re above average compared to many women in today’s society, but would you say you ‘go with the flow’ very often?”

“I mean, I guess so…”

“Oho, care to ask your mother or sister about that?”


“And you’ve been kind of focused on your career lately, would you say you’ve taken a lot of time out for sensual things like baths, beaches, and flowers?

Would you say you’ve shared a lot of intimate moments since you broke up with Dylan, or did you close your feminine heart a bit?”


“I thought so. And then we come to one of the most bimbo-y traits ever —and just so you know it’s crazy-weird to be talking to my own daughter about this— enticing, compelling, sexual attractiveness. Feminine or masculine?”

“Feminine, obviously.”

Bimbo Sex Appeal

“Right, and on a scale of one to ten, where would you rate your sexiness?”

How To Be A Bimbo - Cleavage Photo

"I dunno, six-point-five?

Like, my boobs and booty could be bigger, could use some fillers, could totally dress more enticingly, could have better nails.”

“Sheesh. Emma. Well that was, uh, honest.

The ‘Dad’ in me wants to tell you none of that is true, but I’ll just settle with saying you could give yourself a bit more credit, you’re beautiful and don’t need a single change, at least to me.”

“Yeah, I know Dad, but don’t worry. That’s one thing us models aren’t afraid of— we can assess our physical features openly and honestly, ‘cause it’s basically our career, you know?

No point lying about it or staying ignorant.”

“Well couldn’t you be more positi—”

“—By the same token, I know my complexion is amazing, my tummy is sublime, and my cheekbones are god tier.”

“Yes, well, what I’m getting at is if you want to embody bimbo-y, feminine traits, it’s wise to know

a) what traits those are, and

b) how much practice you’re going to need with any given trait.”

“Well, there’s definitely some of those traits I’m better at, and some that I need a lot of practice at.”

“This goes for everyone, in any subject. Even Serena and Venus Williams have different ‘tennis traits’ that they’re great at, and ones they could use a bit more practice at.

Every characteristic of ‘bimbohood’ is on a spectrum.

You can either be an ‘extreme’ version of that trait, or a ‘moderate’ version, or a ‘tame’ version of it.

You can even be ‘anti’ or ‘against’ a specific trait, but this makes being a ‘bimbo’ tougher and less likely to resonate or be perceived correctly.

Even bimbohood itself is on a spectrum.”

“It is?”

“Yep! Are you a ‘soft’ bimbo, light on most bimbo traits, such as Dolly Parton? Or are you a ‘hard’ bimbo, extreme on most bimbo traits, such as Aletta Ocean?

Either way, it’s good that you’re aware of the traits and how extreme you are on each one.

But can you see how not even having knowledge of what traits are feminine, or how good you are at embodying such traits, could massively hinder your bimbo-journey?”

“Oh totally, this conversation has already helped me so much. But I gotta tell you, I’m still super-hungry to get to the girly beautification stuff.”

“I understand, Em. Let’s get to it then.”



Can you guess why?

Bimbo Transformation Figures

“Um, because there’s no point buying tons of new clothes if they’re not going to fit me in like a month or two?”

“Got it in one.”

“But isn’t it easier to start with fashion or makeup because I can just buy new clothes or accessories or slap on some eye-shadow, easy-peasy?”

“It might seem like starting with fashion is easier, and if you’re really resistant to making physical changes, you can jump right to fashion stuff, but…

…the main foundation of being an excellent bimbo is physical transformation.

The feminine form is the realm of bimboism and it’s the main pillar to start with. There’s a website called that has hundreds of guides, posts, and lessons on the bimbo aesthetic.”

“I’ve heard some kind of shady things about that site though?”

I’m not saying they’re totally right about everything, or that they don’t have a very specific ‘type’ of bimbo they cater to, or that they don’t have a strong agenda…

…but they do offer tons of bimbo style guides, tips, and tricks there.

Before you decide on exactly what you want your form to be like, you may want to browse their offerings or look at famous celebrity bodies that appeal to you.

Just keep in mind that…

Anyone who tells you that ‘genetics’ limit you, isn't worth listening to."

“Why not?”

“Because only you know what you’re capable of in your life.

They’re not you.

Not only that, check out Guinness Records, people have been shattering the projected limits of naysayers for centuries.”

“I never thought about it that way.”

“Exactly. And you have a short time on earth, and you deserve to get as close to your dream body as possible, without listening to haters trying to limit you.

In fact, despite what people used to believe, our cells and bodies are actually something we have immense and immediate control over, whether people realize it or not.

The human body is miraculous.

And Emma, if you feel like it, you should see what your body is really capable of.”

“Wow, that would inspire my friends at the agency.”

“Well, I don’t think they’re aiming for ‘bimbo bodies’, but feel free to pass it on. Anyway, there are many different forms of ‘bimbo body.’

There are ‘bigger’ bimbos, there are ‘petite’ bimbos, but on average, most bimbos are aiming for an hourglass figure.

Marilyn Monroe was 5’5”, had a 23” waist, and weighed about 118lbs. with a bra-size of 36D, and her feminine figure has been a huge inspiration for bimbos everywhere for years.

You can check out the guide I wrote on getting an hourglass figure if you’d like to know more about this.”

“OK, I’ll definitely read it, but for now, please continue.”

“Thank you.

So how do you transform your body?

Well, body-building nutritionists like Lyle McDonald say it’s as simple as ‘calories in vs. calories out.’

Epigenetic fans and law of attraction experts say it’s as simple as ‘mind-over-matter.’

Instagram influencers often swear it’s just blood, sweat, and squats.

Your ‘average bimbo’ will swear it’s surgery or nothing.

Most bimbos assume body-transformation is purely plastic surgery. The truth is, it can be any blend or ratio of these things.”

“How do I know which method is best?”

“There is no ‘best’ transformation method. Everyone is unique, so it only matters which is best for you, and since only you are you, you’ll have to make your own decision.”

“What if I don’t know?”

“Deep down in your heart, you do know, and even if you swear you don’t, you know enough to start gently experimenting with methods that call to you.

Maybe you start with an herb diet, but you’re not feeling it, so you add squats into your routine, which works, but now you’re hungrier, so you end up looking into bone-broth for extra nutrition.

That works better, so now you’re the squats-and-broth girl.

(In fact, squats were used by Bruce Lee, Beyonce, most instagram influencers you can name, and many other celebrities.

Squats are also used by many ‘primitive tribes’ just in their day to day lives and results in absolutely mind-blowing body-transformations, but we’ll get into all that another time.)

The main thing is, does this approach make sense to you?”

“Yeah, I guess what you’re saying is I can’t be afraid to experiment with a variety of methods to get the body I want.”

“Exactly. And if you are afraid, you’ll end up like many other women who have a vision for their dream body, but die with it unfulfilled.”

“Whoa. Pretty dark, Dad.”

“Well it’s true. People die with unfulfilled dreams all the time, and it’s always because they delay and avoid acting on them out of fear. The question is, will you do the same?”

“No way, I’m already taking action by applying what you’re teaching!”

“Excellent. And I want to be clear, I’m going to be discussing most of these changes from the perspective of you—

my physically ‘female-gendered-at-birth’ daughter looking to increase her femininity to lean more towards ‘bimbo’ ideals

—but there’s an extremely active and passionate community of ‘male-gendered-at-birth’ people who are pouring their heart and soul into transitioning not only their gender, but their entire being into that of a ‘bimbo ideal.’”

"What about gender & body transformation?"

Eden 'The_Doll' Estrada

“Like when you say any gender can be a bimbo…

…Do you mean guys wearing feminine makeup and fashion, like Rupaul’s Drag Race vibes, or something more?”

“There are degrees of transformation.

Some people identify as a bimbo just by dressing as one. Others identify as a bimbo by getting major surgeries. Still others identify as a bimbo by truly dedicating their lives to the transformation.

Jessica Alves was born Rodrigo Alves and was originally seen as a ‘human ken doll’, but is now something of a trans-barbie type with over three million Instagram followers.

Eden Estrada has had an insane amount of work done, including voice surgery, to transition from a traditional ‘male’ into a hyper-feminine bimbo.

Nyla Caselli is a trans bimbo with a stunning bimbo-look, and she pulls it off while choosing to avoid ‘bottom-surgery.’”

“Wow. I’m learning so much, this is amazing.”

“I could go on. There are other trans-bimbo types out there: Trisha James, Jaslene Whiterose, Nikki Exotika, and on and on.

Anyway, I’m glad you like it. But this is to help you with your bimbo-journey, so let’s move on to the next tip.

Once you’re satisfied with your body or shape enough, you can move on and start investing in whatever fashions you had on your bimbo vision-board.”

“Eeeeek! I’m so amped for this. I’ve cut out soooo many images from magazines and downloaded tons of Instagrams and Tiktoks for it.”

“Great, well here’s another first for me as a father. Um, Emma, let’s…

Sexify Your Wardrobe."

"Oh. Em. Gee. Dad, I can't believe you're doing this."

How To Be A Bimbo - Wardrobe

“Hon, this either makes me Dad of the year, or has secured my place in hell.”

“Do you want to leave this part to Mom?”

“Well, I’ll help you, but I do have to mention, this feels kinda weird. Are you sure there’s not a law against this?”

“C’mon Dad, relax. It’s all part of being a woman. We have to decide what level of ‘slutty’ we want to show the world…

…so if I’m lucky enough to have supportive parents who understand that and don’t get all squirrely when talking about it, so much the better right?”

“Fair enough. So, I’m not sure if you’ve noticed any fashion trends in the bimbo community, but the overall founding fashion philosophy of bimbohood is…

Show off as much of your physical assets as you can get away with confidently, proudly, and shame-free. Basically:

Dress to impress.

You don’t see a lot of Muslim bimbos because their culture encourages modesty and privacy.

It encourages physical beauty being shared with very few others, whereas bimboism encourages being eye-candy for the world, captivating the attention of many.”

“Actually, there’s a girl at school named Aaliyah, who might be one.”

“Sure, anyone can be a bimbo. Bimbohood is very customizable and adaptable.

I’m just saying Muslim ‘bimbos’ are pretty rare, and their fashion does *not* jive well with bimbofication.”

“No, but stripper clothes do!”

“My god. What am I doing.”

“Relax Dad! I’m not going full-on stripper-mode. I’m just saying, bimbos tend to go with more daring fashions that emphasize their feminine curves and smooth skin, rather than hide them, just like strippers do.”

“Very true. And in my research I found that there’s many different sub-genres of bimbo fashion.

Goth-bimbo, lolita-bimbo, cotton-candy-bimbo, biker-chic-bimbo, cosplay-bimbo, and more.

This means you may want to find inspiration from certain bimbo personalities, make another vision-board just for fashion, experiment with different looks, and assemble your own ‘signature style’.”

So I can rock my own look and stand out and be recognized, even amongst many other bimbos out there, right?”

“Bingo. Which leads me to ask… Do you have any bimbo celebrities you look up to?”

“Cassie’s been on a Nicki Minaj, Cardi B, and Dojacat kick lately, but I don’t know if they count, since they’re basically just celeb-singers.

I’d say Aletta Ocean and Chrissy Chlapecka are two of the most famous ‘modern-day bimbos’, and they’re inspiring in so many ways, but I have a much different body type than them, and I don’t really resonate with their looks all that much.

Unfortunately, like you said, I haven’t immersed myself in the bimbo-world nearly enough, so I can’t name many names off the top of my head.”

“All good, I got you covered. Ready?”


“OK, some of these are more of the ‘soft’ bimbo types, and others are more of the ‘hard’ bimbo types. They’re various ethnicities. I just found whatever I could quick and off-the-cuff:

“Hmmm, I’ve been swiping through all these people as fast as I can, and so far I’m leaning towards Abigail Ratchford or Anastasiya Kvitko.

They both seem to walk a nice line between daring and classy, they both make a wide variety of looks work for them, and they both have huge followings on social, 10-million plus!”

“Sounds great, my sweet. Do whatever suits you. The only thing is that, uh, er, well—”

“They both have bigger boobs and booty than me! You don’t have to tip-toe on eggshells around me Dad. Mom and I have discussed this a hundred times already.”

“Right, er, well, it might be a bit challenging to pull off their looks if you’re not working with the same ‘foundations’, if you know what I mean.”

“I do, but I took a quick glance at your ‘hourglass’ tutorial, and I’m feeling confident I can look like them with a bit of practice and a few tweaks.”

“OK, but you know you don’t have to change yourself to look like them, right?

Khloe Terae is more your body-type and she has some very fashionable bimbo-looks too.”

“I know, Dad, but I have my own hopes and dreams. I have a vision for my body, and I know I can get there.”

“Sigh. OK. Some people are going to say I pushed you towards ‘unrealistic beauty standards.'”

“Well, let them. I’m an expert on me, and I’ve done enough soul-searching on this.

I don’t have some weird beauty standards or ideals to live up to. I see a different way.

It’s more like I’m a body artist.

I have a vision for my figure that I’d like to see made real. It just so happens that my body is the clay in this case. I wanna rock the ‘fits that Abby and Anastasiya rock, and no one’s gonna stop me!”

“Whew. Well, ok then. Let’s say you get the body-transformation you want, how would you start experimenting with fashion?”

“I wouldn’t just go all out immediately.

I’d probably start by trying some lower-cut crop-tops and halter-tops.

Maybe I’d try building whole outfits around a corset statement-piece or bustier or something.

I’ve already rocked some yoga pants and crazy-tight leggings in public, but I’d probably start going out in micro-mini-skirts or scandalously-cut jean shorts. Definitely need way more heels in rotation.”

“Sounds like you’ve got a knack for this and don’t really need my advice here.”

“I guess not, just you pointing me to all these bimbfluencers is more than enough to help me out. Although, my brain keeps saying…

‘You’ll never find clothes like these.’

Maybe you could help with that?”

“Sure. You’ve got to realize, the world is an abundant place.

Every item of clothing you can imagine has probably been made, and is available, if you’re willing to put in a bit of effort for your fashion dreams. Anything can be ordered online, tried on, and refunded or exchanged if not satisfied.”

“I’m willing to do all that, but…

…Where do I even look for bimbo fashions?”

“Well, I’m a guy, and the last thing I should probably know about is the ins-and-outs of bimbo fashion, but I managed to find a ton of reliable sources. Can you guess how?”

“Google, I bet.”

“Yep, I just googled and one of the first results was this article How To Dress Like A Slut (33 Sexy Ways) by April Maccario. See? That wasn’t so hard, Em.”

“Ugh, you don’t have to be so self-righteous about it. Fine, I’ll google some bimbo clothing stores and meet you here later.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll serve you up the answers and save you the work, but I just wanted to be clear, anyone who has dreams of improving their lives should really be knuckling down and doing the google-work necessary, not just begging to be spoon-fed answers.”

“Got it. So where do I look?”

“There’s so much online:

  • FashionNova
  • Shein
  • PrettyLittleThing
  • Boo Hoo
  • Missguided
  • Windsor
  • Dolls Kill
  • Guess, Lipsy, TNA, Forever 21, Aritzia
  • Garage
  • MotelRocks
  • HouseOfCB
  • NastyGal
  • Amiclubwear
  • Lulu’s
  • Revolve
  • Yandy

Now, you should know that the quality of these can vary wildly.

Sometimes they’re pristinely crafted, other times they may suck. They may or may not look the way they do in promo shots.

Fabrics may be thinner, or less durable than you think. Or a piece may be baggy in spots you wouldn’t imagine, or wonky somehow.

It doesn’t mean you can’t have nice things or sexy fashions, it just means sometimes it takes a bit more effort to get that bimbo look. (Consider tailoring).”

“I get it, but if the process of how to be a bimbo was easy, everybody would be doing it!”

“Hah, indeed. And if you’re really concerned, Amazon, AliExpress, and ASOS have a lot of similar items, but with easy-returns policies.

Plus you can find your own sources by googling ‘clubwear’, ‘slutwear’, ‘bimbo clothes’, ‘bimbo fashion’, ‘bodycon dresses’, ‘bodycon clothing’, and stuff like that.

You can even get more niche and bespoke with shops on Etsy such as ultravixenhollywood, TangaLand, or LustVaultNation.”

“OK, now you’re just scaring me. You know a lot about finding slutty clothes online.”

“What can I say, I’m thorough when I research something. There’s even subreddits like r/whoredrobe and r/findfashion dedicated to finding out where people bought their sexy fashions. Or this video from Penny Angela called ‘How To Be A Bimbo On A Budget.’”


“Heh, I can’t help myself. And it doesn’t stop there, after I got done with outerwear, I ended up down a rabbit hole of underwear.”

“Wait, I’m actually going to talk to my Dad about lingerie?”

“Yep, because a) when I hesitated earlier you said you wanted to talk clothes with me, and b) because bimbos are all about that…

Fashion Nova Bimbo Ad 1080
Bimbo Lingerie Love 1080

…Lingerie love.

Bimbos use lingerie for almost everything.

To a bimbo, lingerie is prettier, sexier, and more attention-grabbing.

In an attention-based economy, bimbos know that lingerie is flat-out more valuable than other clothing.

They do their best to work lingerie-vibes into everything, and can even be found using lingerie as actual outfits for public consumption, or centerpieces of their outfits.”

“Mom’s taken me to Victoria’s Secret and La Senza, but I don’t think they’re really bimbo-level. I wouldn’t even know where to start.”

“Well, fortunately I found a great list on reddit that’s often updated, here’s a quick taste:

  • Agent Provocateur – slick, strappy, cosmopolitan, ruffles – $
  • Bare Necessities – retailer, searchable, variety, commercial – $/$
  • Bluebella – racy, complex, exquisite, ribbed cups – $
  • DesireLoveDare – unsupported, lacy, textured, frilly – $
  • Dreamgirl – wholesale, copycat, variety – $
  • Edge O’ Beyond – frilly, boho, lacy, airy – $
  • Flash You + Me – sheer, strappy, bondage, modern – $
  • Godsavequeens – strappy, lacy, lightweight, sheer – $
  • Gooseberry – instagram, textured, sheer, embellished, lacy – $
  • Honey Birdette – slutty, dominant, leather, O-rings – $
  • Impudique – racy, bdsm, sheer, strappy- $
  • Kiki de Montparnasse – lightweight, understated, modern – $
  • La Perla – luxury, high-end – $
  • Lovechild Boudoir – harness, high-end, ornate, textured – $
  • Marie Mur – bdsm, submissive, sheer, slutty, harness – $
  • Miss tic (Ukraine) – strappy, copycat, elegant, submissive – $
  • Monsterladies – ornate, frilly, custom, victorian – $
  • Passionata – modern, sleek, understated – $
  • Petite Cherry – kawaii, girly, lacy – $
  • Rene Rofe – stripper, racy, variety, copycat – $
  • Shein – retailer, copycat, cheap, variety – $
  • Trasparenze – pricey, high-end, stockings, legs – $
  • True&co – custom, everyday, casual, bespoke – $
  • Victoria’s Secret – retailer, slutty, commercial, variety, cheap – $
  • What Katie Did – vintage, pinup, retro, silky – $
  • Wolford – stockings, tights, legs, pricey – $
  • Yandy – retailer, cheap, box lingerie, costume, variety, stripper – $

“Holy moly! That’s amazing, thank you!”

“Yeah, you can also try subreddits such as r/FindLingerie, just uh… shop responsibly. Also, there’s a lot of artistry and creativity that goes into using lingerie wisely.

Bimbos who are good at this really compel a lot of attention, and bimbos who do it poorly tend to be shunned.

So it may be worth studying the art of intimate apparel more than usual, at least if you’re going to try using lingerie pieces in your day-to-day outfits somehow.”

“I’m loving all this, I honestly can’t believe you even found anything beyond La Vie En Rose or something, most guys are clueless about lingerie.”

“Wait til you hear what’s next.”


"Bimbo jewelry and bimbo accessories."

“Oooh, sparkly!”

“Yes. Accessories are like the garnish on a well-plated meal, or like easter-eggs in a video game, or like heated tile in a bathroom.

Accessories are the subtle details of how to be a bimbo, at least fashion-wise.

Accessories can put your outfit way ahead of the rest.”

“So, –like– a bimbo wearing a short skirt and tight top is okay, but another wearing the same thing with a rhinestone necklace and a pink-dyed lock of hair is straight-up better, right?”

“That’s the idea, yes.”

“OK, what accessories should I be looking at, and where can I find them?”

“It’s really up to you and your personal style. A goth-bimbo may want steel-spider or silver-skull earrings, whereas a ‘ditz’ bimbo may want gold-heart or rainbow-unicorn earrings.”

“Oooh, and I bet she’d like to have a matching rainbow lollipop, too.”

“See? You’re getting the hang of it, just be creative. There are knick-knacks, jewelry, and accessories all over the place. Some are specifically made for bimbos, others are just ‘innocent’ items, that you can ‘make your own’ and ‘bimbofy’ them into your outfit.”

“I do love Claire’s and Ardene’s, I get tons of accessories from those stores!”

“Bimbo accessories are usually more daring than normal though.

For example, most women keep ‘chokers’ to a minimum, bimbos often have a collection of them. It’s not common for ‘normal women’—” I emphasized the label’s silliness by using ‘air quotes’ “—to rock pasties or nipple-covers very often, but for some bimbos, it could be monthly, or even weekly.”

Bimbo Jewelry Choker

“Wow. Chokers? Pasties?

Even my model-friends don’t wear this stuff often, if at all.”

“Yeah, that’s what I meant. Bimbo-accessories are a bit more daring or rare than most.”

“I get it. Anything else?”

“Sure, leggings, tights, and hosiery are bimbo staples, fishnets especially. Handbags, clutches, phone-cases and more can play a role.

Consider gloves & garters. Consider corsets & harnesses. Plus, bracelets, necklaces, piercings, anklets, and belly-chains can do a lot of work.

Actually, anything with chains, studs, or ‘wet-look’ can help give ‘bdsm’ vibes.”

“I’ve seen a lot of bimbos wear that ‘Harley Quinn’ shirt from Suicide Squad.”

“Oh, the ‘Daddy’s Lil Monster’ tee?

Yeah, sexual, scandalous, or provocative messages on clothing might even count as an ‘accessory’ for many bimbos. Wearing a short-cropped shirt is one thing, wearing one that says ‘no bra club’ is another thing entirely.

Did you know that in my younger years, your Mom and I actually ran a ‘kink clothing store’ that had a lot of t-shirts and tank tops that catered to bimbos?”

“What?! No way. You’re kidding me!”


Did you know that in my younger years, your Mom and I actually ran a ‘kink clothing store’ that had a lot of t-shirts and tank tops that catered to bimbos?”

“What?! No way. You’re kidding me!”

“Yep, it was called ‘RyzeKink’ and we had tons of edgy designs and messages on clothes.”

“How do I grow up in this household and not know this stuff?”

“I dunno, we only had it for like a year, and it never really came up until you went insane and started obsessing over bimbosity.”


“I’m just saying, heh. Anyway, back to accessories. There’s entire categories like ‘slut_accessories’ and ‘bimbo_jewelry’ for this stuff on Etsy.

You can also check out, look for sexy accessories on poshmark or AliExpress, etc. Be creative, maybe find girly masquerade masks, or heck, how about bimbofied medical masks?”

“Wow. You’ve really opened my eyes to the possibilities that accessories give for creating my own signature bimbo look.”

“I’m glad, and let’s not forget probably the most important bimbo accessory ever…

…high heels.”

High Heels.

How often do you wear high heels, Em?"

How To Be A Bimbo - High Heels

“I don’t wear heels often but I do love them.

I have ‘baby heels’ but I want to get some sexy stripper ones.”

“Sigh. Are we really talking about this? Pinch me, I’m must be dreaming. OK, well do you know how to walk in, erm, stripper heels?”

“Well no. But I want to be able to walk, dance, and even run in them.”

“The first step is to pick some out…you can try:

…these are a good start. But I read some tips in my research that might be helpful to you.”

“Ohhh yay! I love tips!”

“Good. Cause I have a bunch…

…Take small steps.

You can’t take giant steps, even if you do have longer legs. You could become unsteady and fall over. While I might think that’s sometimes laugh-worthy, it’s not very bimbo-like to be sprawled on the ground, bleeding.”

I smirked at Em while she stuck her tongue out at me, then continued talking,

“Also, walk heel to toe.

Be purposeful when walking with heels and make sure the heel touches the ground before the toe. Unless you’re walking up a flight of stairs…

The stuff I read said that if you’re walking upstairs to make sure that only your toe touches the stairs.

Putting your full foot on the stairs with heels on is difficult, and not recommended. It’s not good for the shoe either, because the heel is the weakest, and it could cause you to fall.

As long as no one gets hurt, I may get a chuckle when someone wobbles in heels, but it’s not very pretty.”

“Dad! I’m not gonna fall.” Em pouted.

“Ok sorry, more tips…

…Don’t rush.

I’ve seen women running in their heels, and you can do it too, but only after you’ve practiced a lot.

When you can wear heels flawlessly then you might be able to speed up your pace. But in the beginning, just take your time.

Another thing I read was to…

…lean back a bit.

Women tend to lean forward in the beginning because they’re used to walking faster, so they compensate by leaning forward. Instead, just lean back a bit.”

I leaned back to show Emma what I meant, and I struck a feminine pose that made her burst out laughing.

Bimbo Heels 1080

“Daaaaad! You look hilarious, and, well, as gay as my friend Chad – who’s even more gay than Brian, though your duck face needs some work.

I can teach you how.” She said, erupting in girly giggles.

“Hey! My duck face is extra, uh, ducky, when I’m in ‘bimbo-teaching mode’ young lady.”

I tried to keep a straight face but ended up laughing along with her.

“Ok, ok, back to your heels lessons!” I kissed her cheek and struck my pose again and leaned back to show her. “Like this Em. Make sure your back is straight, your shoulders are back, and your uh, um, boobs are pushed out.”

Em stood up and struck a similar pose but she looked much better than I did, doing so.

“I don’t need this for my Instagram-modeling, but do you mean like this?” She pushed her shoulders back.


When you walk, make sure you remember to keep your shoulders back.

Just like that.”

“Great! Thanks, Dad. Any other tips?”

“Just one more…and it seems obvious, but may not be.

Wear shoes that fit your feet properly.

If they’re too big or too small you will look really funny when you walk. You want to look graceful like you’re gliding across the floor. And one of the easiest ways to do that is to have shoes that fit you well.

Heels are a super-deep topic, so you may want to check out PinkBimboAcademy’s ‘Heels Lessons’ archive.”

Em nodded and said “I can’t wait to try these tips when I get my giant Pleaser heels.

I’m ordering some tonight so I can get started practicing, thanks Dad.”

“Sounds good Em, though I’d appreciate it if you’d stop throwing around the phrase ‘giant Pleaser heels,’ especially if we have guests over.” I tilted my head,

“Anyway, heels are an important part of how to be a bimbo, but so is makeup. So…

Make-up mastery is next.”

“I know how to put on makeup, Dad!” Emma exclaimed.

Lipsticks - How To Be A Bimbo

“I know how to put on makeup Dad!” Emma exclaimed.

I laughed “I know and it always looks beautiful on you. But how *much* do you wear?

Have you mastered every makeup technique out there?

I doubt it because your makeup always looks the same, honey-bear.

And before you get defensive it’s not an insult, I love your look. But if you’re honest, Em, are you so good at makeup that you could give tips to other bimbos on how to improve their makeup skills? Is your makeup inspiring other bimbos?

Are you ‘turning up’, as you kids like to say?”

“Well, no, not now, but I definitely could. I love makeup and just need to learn more about it and experiment with bolder, brighter colors. Most sexy bimbos wear lots of colors.”

“I know you can learn more, that’s what you’re here for now…

…but are you learning from…

James Charles, Jeffree Star, or Lauren Luke who by the way taught your mom how to do her makeup! They’re huge on YouTube but some others who happen to get rave reviews on Reddit are:

From Head To Toe, Taylor Wynn, and Samantha Jane. These may be lesser known makeup guru’s, but you may be able to learn unique tricks from them too..”

“But Dad, none of them have the bimbo aesthetic…ok maybe, uh, Jeffree Star.” Emma giggled.

“Yes, but perhaps start learning from the masters I mentioned and then you can add your own bimbo-y artistic flare to what they teach you. You don’t have to use nude colors like they do in some of their videos.

Try hot pink, purples and blues using their techniques. It’s not about the color, it’s how you apply it and how you make it into bimbo makeup that you like and that looks nice on you.

You’re smart Em, use your brain.” I said, though it came out a bit more sternly than I had intended.

“Sorry Em, I didn’t mean to sound so harsh. I know you’re artistic and creative and can use what they teach you to create art.”

Her tiny pout turned into a grin from the compliment.

“Thanks Dad. I know. I just thought there’d be some bimbos in that list,” she said.

I sighed internally ”Ok, I kinda knew this would happen, so here’s a video that may be more what you were hoping for…

Bimbo Makeup 1080

…here’s an old Jessy Bunny bimbo tutorial before she got her 1500 cc’s done. I’m shocked that I know that information now.”

I rolled my eyes and shook my head.

“A third one is Sambalina’s tutorial for a ‘90’s Playboy Bunny’ look. Last but not least, here’s a whole playlist of Doll/Bimbo Makeup Tutorials.

“Oh thanks Dad! These are great but while you were telling me about them I realized you were right,” she smiled wryly.

“I know I was right. Wait. About what?” I smirked knowing full well what she meant.

“You were right that I should learn how to master the basics of makeup and then I can learn to make it my own. Bright, bold, and bimbo-y,” She reached across the couch and hugged me quickly.

I knew you’d be helpful even if you’ve never put on makeup before.”

“I’ve never worn makeup but I have admired it on many women—err-–-I mean on your mom.” We both glanced at the kitchen to see if Maria heard me but she wasn’t paying attention. We both looked at each other and burst out laughing. Once we calmed ourselves, Emma looked at me expectantly.

“Yes? We covered makeup but I didn’t talk much about eyes.”

“Makeup *goes* on my eyes, Dad, I know that!” She stuck her tongue out at me again.

“Haha, I know that smarty-pants. But when you express how you feel with a look, what part of your face are you using primarily? Your nose?” I tried to look serious, but my smile gave me away.

“My eyes. Duh, Dad,” Em replied.

“Right…because the eyes are what?”

“The eyes are bimbo windows to the soul.”

“Think of all your fave models, actresses, or bimbo idols. The people you look up to in these areas. What do you notice about their eyes?”

“Ummm… they’re big?”

“Exactly. How big?”

“Well, it varies.”

“Sure, but if you had to give all ‘bimbo eyes’ a label, would it be ‘small’, ‘medium’, ‘large’, or ‘anime-level-big’?”

“I guess they’d all have anywhere from ‘large’ eyes to ‘anime-level’ eyes.”

“And did they always have this since birth?”

“Hmm, probably not. They probably realized that big eyes are powerful, feminine, and bimbo-y and made intentions to have them.”

“And how did they get them?”

Maybe they got really good at eye-makeup to make them bigger. Maybe they got surgery. Maybe they did eye exercises or made a point to adjust their ‘eye posture’.

Maybe they just used mind over matter and law of attraction.”

“Good hypotheses. Ultimately though, you believe they somehow made their eyes look bigger over time, yes?”


“So now you have another clue on how to elevate your own hyper-feminine bimbo-ness, should you so desire.”

“Dang, this bimbo stuff is way deeper and more nuanced than I ever realized.”

“Most things are. People think making a good speech is ‘simple’, but it’s actually quite nuanced. People think playing League Of Legends is just a matter of clicking buttons, but it’s actually extremely nuanced. People think a relationship is just getting involved with another human being, but…”

“…it’s actually crazy nuanced!”

“Bingo. And if you think eyes hold a lot of bimbo-power, wait til we discuss other facial features.”

“Such as…?”

“Cheeks, lips, brows, teeth, and nose.”

“Oh my god. Are you telling me I need total facial reconstruction? I’m a model for heaven’s sake!”

“Calm yourself, my darling. I’m just saying these facial features are aspects of bimbo-ness you may want to consider, or at least inform yourself of.

There are plenty of bimbos who don’t alter any of these things in particular and who just stick to fashion and makeup as their main focus.”

Kim Kardashian Bimbo Face 1080

“Whew. OK. Then let’s hear it. What about cheeks?”

“Bimbos often aim to have high, well-contoured cheekbones, but without going too severe.”

“I can understand that. I believe Khloe Kardashian had some pretty major cheek surgery (but I’m not sure). Demi Rose Mawby probably doesn’t see herself as a bimbo, but although she has good cheekbones, she still makes sure she has some ‘roundness’ in her cheeks. Same goes for Kylie Pag— uh, nevermind.”

“I don’t know who that is, but something tells me I’m better off not knowing.

Anyway, Chrissy Chlapecka can often be found with a stenciled heart or some other cute item drawn on her right cheekbone, can you tell me why?”

“Because she has feminine cheekbones and she’s smart enough to draw attention to them?”

Bimbo Lips Hero 1080

“Bravo, miss. Can you tell me anything about bimbo lips?”

“Oh, that’s an easy one. They’re all big, soft, puckered pillows.”

“Well, not every single one, but yes, it’s a common bimbo staple to plump up one’s lips. Some do it simply through face paint like lipstick and gloss, others do it through surgery and lip-fillers, some have success getting plump lips through home remedies

But whatever the case, this facial feature is often a big focus for up-and-coming bimbos. How about brows?”

Bimbo Brows - Flavor

“Bimbo brows are always on fleek.”

“I’m not sure that’s English, but if you mean they’re often well-groomed with exquisite attention then yes.”

“Me and my friends fill-in our brows pretty often, but are you saying bimbos go further than that?”

“Not necessarily, a bit of makeup can work wonders and is very common, yes, but some bimbos actually ‘thin out’ their brows when they’re trying to make their face look more delicate.

Others do make theirs thicker and fuller using different methods, like castor oil. More than that though, many bimbos actually choose a specific ‘brow shape’ that suits their face.”

“True, I’ve totally compared brow-shapes with my girlfriends, but I never thought about intentionally changing them.”

“Again, you don’t have to, it’s just food for thought. The point is, not all eyebrow shapes will suit your particular face.”

Bimbo - Face Shape

“Hey, what are you saying about my face-shape?”

“Faces can either be round, square, oval, long, or some blend of these. It’s usually in your best interest to wear sunglasses that suit your face shape. So can you guess how this applies to eyebrows?”

“Yeah, I should groom my brows to suit my particular shape.”

“Yep, after all, your eyebrows add dimension to your face.

If you have a round or oval face, a thicker brow with a slight arch is recommended to make your face appear longer.

On the other hand, if you have a square-shaped face, you may want to try a less angled brow.

Brows can impact your overall look, or even your ‘look of the day.’ Some are more flexible than others. Some can add a feminine touch to a masculine face.

Thin brows can actually help in this case. But thin brows can also make an already feminine-face seem too feminine, airy, and almost invisible. They can lack ‘pop’, ‘boldness’, and ‘eye-catching-ness.’

In cases like that you may want thicker brows.

Either way, a badly shaped eyebrow that’s too thick, thin, or over the top can ruin your entire look.

Your brows can start as either a blessing or a curse on your bimbo journey, but ultimately you can influence their look, if you want.”

“Again, my mind is blown, you’ve put way more thought into eyebrows than I ever did.”

“Welllll… you know how I do, what I do, when I do, what I do.”

“So. Cheesy.”

“Speaking of cheese, let’s talk teeth.

Bimbo Teeth - Britney Spears

“I think my pearly whites are pretty good, don’t you?”

“Of course, honey, like I said, I wouldn’t change a hair on your head. This whole thing is all about what you desire for yourself.

Many famous women have made changes to their chompers. Kylie Jenner, Cardi B, and Miley Cyrus all went through intentional teeth transformations. You can follow their lead, or stay as you are, or do something else entirely.”

“Thanks, and now that you mention it, maybe they could be a shade whiter.”

“Suit yourself.

As with all other things we’ve discussed, there are many methods and approaches to getting what you want.

Some people get tooth veneers, others use supplements, others get special pastes or mouthwashes, others have even had success with ‘subliminals’ for whiter teeth, though I’m not sure how much stock I put in that.”

“And as usual, it’s up to me to experiment and find whatever blend of methods work for me.”

“You got it, and where’s a good place to start?”

“With the ‘boring’ work of actually googling properly.” Emma sighed. “I know.”

“Good, because I’m not a fan of repeating myself if I can avoid it. Good google-fu applies to nose tweaks too, of course.”

Bimbo Nose - Kylie Jenner

“My nose is pretty feminine, I feel.”

“Great, though you started out saying you had no desire for improved teeth too, so I’m taking it with a grain of salt.”

“No, honestly this time. My nose is pretty dainty, delicate, and feminine. It fits beautifully on my face and offsets the rest of my features well.

All my girlfriends are jealous of it and I think it’s how I got so many photoshoots booked when I first started out.”

“Sounds great, and I totally agree with you my dear, you’ve a beautiful nose. Not everyone feels the same though, so here’s what my research turned up (heh) on noses:

Symmetry and morphology (protrusion) is important. Vertical and transverse proportion is important. Nasal index, nasolabial angle, and your naso-facial angle are important. Columella-Alar Relationship is important. Forehead and brow-ridge are important.

The list goes on.“

“What. The. Eff?”

“Yeah, I had trouble digesting it all when I first read about it. Basically, it means every little detail of the nose you can think of is important, at least when aiming for the ideal ‘sexiest’ nose you can.”

“Ahhhhhh, I’m frickin’ panicking! I thought my nose was awesome!”

“Chill out, honey. It is! You’re fine.

You actually score quite highly on each of the qualities I mentioned. Your nose could be in the Guinness World Records for beauty. Please don’t freak out.

On top of that, there’s no ‘one right nose.’ if you have a wide face, a tiny, thin nose may not suit you. If you’ve a small, slender face, a pointy-long nose may sit awkwardly on your face.

Everyone is different and should aim for whatever nose suits and satisfies them best.

There are definitely famous models and bimbos with ‘non-ideal’ noses, but you’re already doing great in this area.”

“Thank god. My entire modeling identity practically hinges on my nose. My heart nearly jumped out of my chest.

What do people do when they want to change all those details of their nose?”

“Oh, all sorts of things.

Of course, in the bimbo world, many just opt for surgery, but there are people who do use more natural methods.

Sometimes beginner bimbos without a lot of disposable income simply work around their nose issues by changing the size of their sunglasses or facial jewelry.

Others use makeup and contouring to adjust their nose’s look.

Others simply draw the viewer’s eyes to their giant boobs or bum instead.”

“Well, I’m glad this is one area I don’t need to focus too much on, personally.”

“Sure, but let’s be honest, you could totally use a boost in…

…Nailing down the next steps.”

“Is that a dig at my nails?

Geez Dad, I paint them myself all the time! What’s your damage?”

“Hey, don’t take it personally, I’m just saying, compare your nails to all your ‘bimbo’ role-models and tell me what you notice.”

“Uh, well, mine are wayyyy shorter than theirs. And they put lots of cute designs on theirs. They also change up the style, length, and colors often. They love super long nails, they’re usually flawless and unchipped.”

Emma pouted and looked down at her nails.

I had to chuckle. “Emma, I’m not saying this to make you feel bad about your nails, honey.”

She looked up at me and grinned. “I know that Dad! My nails are decent compared to my classmates but total crap for a bimbo. If I want to be like these beautiful goddesses then my nails had better match.”

I grinned back at her. “Good. I’m glad you get it!…

Bimbo Nails 1080

…so there’s length, style, colors & designs, types of manicures, and touch-up frequency just to start.”

“Whoa! That’s just for my nails?” She shook her head and smiled. “Being a bimbo takes lots of attention to detail! Good thing I had a great teacher for that,” she winked at me.

“Oh, what have I gotten myself into?” I laughed. “Ok young lady, first let’s start with length, your real nails aren’t that long. You’ve never really had long nails. What’s your preference for length, Em?”

“Well I love Candy Bimbo’s nails but they’re crazy-insane long. I don’t think I could type, or do other –ahem– personal hygiene things with them that long.” She giggled and wiggled her fingers at me.

“Then you know you don’t want super long. Maybe you start with a smaller nail and work up to super-long after you’ve had practice typing, eating, and, as you said, ‘doing other things’ with them before you explore those ‘nine-inch nails.’

See what I did there, Em?”

“Dad! Omg, you’re so lame. No one even listens to NIN anymore. They’re so over.” I shrugged and she kept talking, “Ok, I agree with you. I’ll start short and practice getting used to longer than usual, work my way up to…” she looked at a loss for words, rolled her eyes, and said…”Nine-inch nails. There, happy? I used your lame joke.”

“Hey! It was apropos!”

“Yeah, yeah, old man. So how do I decide how long to start with?” She smiled.

“Well, that depends also on style.

Do you want a rounded nail?

A square nail?

A pointed nail?

Or maybe a coffin nail?

If they’re really long maybe the square doesn’t look as nice as the coffin to you, like it does to me? Or maybe you hate long pointed nails, but love the way they look when shorter?

It really depends on your preferences. I personally like a medium-length coffin-style nail the best. But that’s just me.”

Emma nodded dutifully, taking in my suggestions and looking at the photos on her phone. “Ok, Dad. I get it. I’ll have to think it over and maybe I can experiment with different shapes and lengths with those press-on nails I saw at ‘Shoppers’ last week.”

“That’s a great idea! Experiment and practice. You know how much I love those two things!”

“Chill out Dad, I know, I know. So what’s next… um, colors, right?”

“Yep. So do you want to experiment with bright colors? Dark colors? Multi-colors?

Your mom recently came home with 5 different shades of pink on her nails that I thought looked great on her. Your nails are a perfect canvas for you to play with all kinds of colors and designs

…but you’ll want to take the length into consideration too. Some of those quirky designs can only fit on super long nails, and some only look nice on wide or short nails too. The shape will also matter.”

“Wow you really thought this all through!"

“I try,” I said with a grin.

“I mean, I’m not surprised, but I love it. You’re the best and so helpful.”

“Well I’m glad you appreciate my detail-addiction,” I chuckled, then continued.

“Now we’re on to the type of nails: acrylic, gel, or dip powder, again the length and style might matter here, but I’m not sure.

I do know that your mother gets gel nails because she doesn’t have to sit under a fan and wait for the polish to dry. She used to knick her polish before they were ready every. Single. Time.” I squinted, but then flashed a grin.

“She used to get so mad,” I lowered my voice to make sure Maria didn’t hear me laughing at her past anger.

“Ok, this is awesome. I’ve never had any of them. I’ll have to ask mom which ones she prefers since she’s been getting her nails done for so long. Maybe she has an idea of which one will be better for me to start with.

Though, the idea of not waiting for my nails to dry is very appealing. So I may just start with the gels. We’ll see what mom says.”

“Agreed. I’ve never had my nails done, so best to ask her. She’ll know better than I. I can just teach you your options.”

Em nodded. “Still, you’re great at this, Dad!”

“Thank you, thank you very much,” I said in my best Elvis Presley impersonation. “I’m so happy I’ve become a bimbo-nail expert,” my eyes rolled way up.”

“Ok, next!”

“Oh, look at little-miss-impatient. Maybe I need a nap all of a sudden,” I pretended to walk away.

“No, Daddy! I’m sowwy. Pleeeeaassse tell me what’s next!” Emma used her cute baby voice to break me.

“Fine. I’ll stay and help. But be nice, and know this is under protest.” I joked.

“I’m always nice, Daddy” Em batted her lashes.

“Well, we’re almost done anyway.

The next lesson is frequency.

You said the bimbos you look up to have flawless and unchipped nails.

“I did.”

“Do you think they paint their nails once a month like you do? Or do you think they stay on top of them? Do you think they’re getting them filled before a nail breaks or a chip happens?

What do you think they do when they lose or chip a nail?”

Em mulled it over for half a second and said, “No, they don’t do them once a month. They stay on top of their nails. Just like they do their makeup and treatments, clothes, shoes, and everything else that goes into being a bimbo.

They prioritize it.

So if they break a nail or lose one they probably have them repaired immediately. And I would bet they do the same if they chip the polish…

…Mom doesn’t though. She waits until her next appointment if she loses one. So when I have mine, I’ll do better. I will stay on top of them. I will make sure they look flawless, always.”

“Ha! I barely had to teach there. That means you’re getting it! Good girl.” Em beamed at me.

“Anyway, we’ve covered the overall body, wardrobe, most facial features, and nails. Are you satisfied so far?”

“I am, but I’m really curious about hair now, and we didn’t really discuss the importance of eye-lashes while we were talking about eyes.”

“I hear where you’re coming from, Emma-dear. So let’s get into…

…Hair, there, not everywhere.”

“Such a Dad-joke. Do you even hear yourself sometimes?”

Bimbo Hair, Brush, Dryer, Shaver

"Hair jokes are fun.

And hey, I’m proud of every line.”

“You would be.”

“Do you want to learn about bimbo hair, or not?”

“K, sorry, go ahead.”

“Many masculine-leaning people have short-cropped hair, buzzcuts, or even shave their heads completely.

This is because it’s more ‘functional’, more ‘utilitarian’, more ‘efficient’, or more ‘productive.’ Bimbos turn their hair into a toy.

They aren’t prioritizing functionality or utility, they know that longer hair will come with more time-consuming management, but they also know it’s one of the most fun, most beautiful physical traits a person can have.

It doesn’t mean there are no bimbos with short hair, but it does mean you may want to heavily consider your hair length when creating your own ideal bimbo-look.”

“I totally do. Ever since I was a little girl I wanted Barbie-level locks. I’m not quite there yet, but I will be.”

“Well, Barbie dolls have long hair on their head, long lashes on their eyes, but are, uh, hairless smoothness just about everywhere else.

Facial hair below the eyeline, especially is an issue, because makeup and powder cling to hair, making them extra-visible, and resulting in a sticky mess with very visible crumbs and cracks on one’s skin-surface.

All this is to say, most bimbos tend to view luscious locks on scalp & lashes, and hairlessness below as a ‘feminine ideal’ worth aiming for.”

“As do I!”

“Well there’s lots of ways to accomplish this, everything from hair-extensions, to laser hair removal (LHR), shaving, waxing, depilatory creams, electrolysis, threading, and more.

There’s even new stuff I’ve barely even heard of like Intense Pulse Light by Kaloya Dermatech. You can check places like the Long Hair Care Forum or Hair Care Alley for more tips on shine, length, hair-health, etcetera.”

“Whoa, I had no idea I’d have two weeks of straight googling to do after our chat.”

“Hey, bimbo-life isn’t for the timid, or those unwilling to commit to the journey. If you can’t even spend some time learning about these things, it’s probably not for you.”

“Ouch. C’mon, I’m totally up for it, I’m just saying, there’s so many approaches to transformation out there. Why do bimbos care so much about hair anyways?”

“I believe it’s because hair was necessary back in the savage, cave-man days, sure, but in today’s world, humans have lost most of our body-hair, and bimbos are looking to evolve that even further into elevated smoothness, grace, and physical elegance.

So most bimbos find their own way to avoid having a single hair or stubble on her body below her eyeline.”

“That makes sense, though I bet Mia’s feminist ideals would throw a hissy fit if I told her this, ell oh ell.”

“I mean, while some people (often ‘hippies’ or certain brands of ‘feminist’) believe that gravitating towards a hairier physical appearance is actually an empowering act of femininity…

…bimbos believe that an evolved, feminine body is one more distanced from our hairy Neanderthal days, and one that embraces a life as a hairless, pristine, canvas.

You, and Mia, have to choose for yourselves what resonates with you, but please try not to judge others and let everyone take their own path in life.”

Bimbo Hair Pink 1080

“You know I will, I just like giving Mia sh –uh– ‘crap’ for her eye-rollingly zealous feminism.

What about hair dye?

Most bimbos seem to go blonde from what I’ve seen.”

“Blonde is common, yes, but you’ll also see plenty of vibrant colors: pinks, purples, greens, blues.

Bimbos believe there’s no point in having long hair to play with if you don’t actually play with it. It’s encouraged to experiment with hair-styles, hair-colors, hair-accessories, and more.”

“So blonde isn’t absolutely essential?”

“No, not at all. But there’s something about light, radiant, platinum or golden tresses that do ‘call’ to many on their bimbo journey.

That said, there are plenty of bimbos who aren’t caucasian who simply keep their natural brown or black hair, instead focusing on tweaking other aspects of their look.”

”Hmmm… I’ll have to give this some more thought. Cassie had a blonde phase for a while, I’ll probably talk to her about it.”

“Sounds like a plan. And once you’ve got your hair styled as desired and body-hair eliminated, people will be paying a lot more attention to your skin. In particular your…

Bimbo Skin 1080

…skin, pores, tattoos, and more.”

“Puh-leeze! No more Dad lines and rhymes.” Emma’s eyes popped open, “Oh no, now I’m even doing it.”

“Haha, there’s no escape, it’s contagious!”

“Whatever, just tell me about pores and tats and stuff so I can pretend this never happened.”

“A lot of bimbos like tans, whether real or fake.

There’s also a whole sub-genre of bimbo that loves tattoos and ‘getting inked.’

There’s apparently some controversy over this, with some bimbos claiming unblemished, unmarked skin is more feminine, with others claiming their ‘pristine canvas’ is meant to be inked.

Regardless of what camp you fall in, the majority of bimbos, inked-or-not, prioritize having porcelain-smooth skin and tiny, invisible pores.”

“Is that even possible to change? I’ve never heard of anyone changing their pores.”

“Most things you can imagine are possible to realize in one way or another. The reason most people haven’t heard of these things is really quite simple.”

“Why’s that?”

“They haven’t bothered looking, at least not properly.”

“This is going to be another lecture on the power of google, isn’t it.”

“I’ll just say that whatever you think is impossible, has probably already been done and documented, multiple times, and anyone who can google resourcefully, patiently, for more than fifteen minutes at a time is going to find them.

For example, it took me literally under a minute to find this, this, and this. Besides, your mother actually wrote an in-depth article on skincare I suggest you check out.”

“Okay, okay, geez. Everything is changeable, at least somewhat, and if I care to find proof and evidence of that, I very likely will if I put my mind to it. Now let’s talk about some majorly important ‘bimbo’ stuff.”

“And what might that be?”

“Booty, boobs, and surgery.”

“Ah yes, a topic on everyone’s minds.

Let me guess, you want your booty to ‘go viral.’

You want it to ‘break the internet’ like Kim Kardashian?”

“I mean, I wouldn’t be mad, but mostly I just want it to match the vision in my head.”

“And that vision is?”

“I want a…

sexy booty that
looks & feels good.

I want it to be valuable, improve my life."

Bimbo Booty - The Outback Barbie

I want my booty to be something I’m super proud of.

I want people to notice it and think, ‘wow, that ass just made my day so much better.’”

“I see. That’s a wonderful vision and intention to have, but have you researched different ‘booty shapes’? Have you looked into different role-models who you’d like to emulate?”

“Grrr, no, I haven’t. And I know what you’re gonna say. Google it.”

“Yes because–”

“–because yadda yadda ‘I’ve been lazy and slacking on taking steps towards my dream booty. Because I have all the resources of the internet at my fingertips, but instead I just wait for you to spoon feed answers to me.’ I know, can you let it go?”

“I can, but look, my darling. It’s really disrespectful to teachers like me to make us do all the legwork while you sit back and play video-games.

Remember, you asked me to teach you how to be a bimbo.

It’s *your* dream to transform into a bimbo, not mine, so is it fair that I’m doing all the mental work, I’m doing all the research, I’m doing all the googling?”

“You have a point, and I’m sorry, and I really will dedicate myself to looking up all this stuff, but would you mind giving me a quick summary?”

Bimbo Booty 1080

“Fine. So.

There are 4-6 different types of booty-shape, depending on what articles you read. Sometimes ‘bubble’ butts are in, sometimes ‘heart-shaped’ bootys are in.

Some people’s bodies look better with v-shapes, others look better with h-shapes. Most bimbos lean towards the two former shapes though.”

“Bubble and heart?”

“Correct, but there are plenty of successful bimbos from all 4 categories.”

“What shape is Kim Kardashian’s?”

“It’s a bubble-butt, and interesting side-facts, her booty is insured, she works out religiously to keep it in shape, and she submitted herself for x-rays on an episode of Keeping Up With The Kardashians just to put booty-surgery rumors to rest.”

“Hmm, I’m leaning towards ‘bubble’ then, Kim’s really is captivating.”

“Fair enough, but you might want to check out Scarlett Johansson’s to get a look at a well-curved heart-shape, since that’s another favorite of many bimbos.”

“Ohhhh, you’re right, super-sexy. Kind of similar to Rihanna’s, I think?”

“Yep, they both have a ‘heart’ shaped booty.”

“OK, I’m sold, heart-shaped is what I want, how do I get it?”

“Well, you can explore videos like this one, but an attractive bum is more than just the shape. It’s proportion, ratio, smoothness, and more.”

“Ooh, I see.”

“Have you heard of waist-to-hip ratio (WHR)?”

“Sure, lots of photographers compliment me on mine, I didn’t realize it was related to my butt though.”

“Well, it is. It’s widely agreed that a waist-to-hip ratio of 0.7 in women is generally found to be the most attractive by men. You can look it up if you want.”

“I’ll take your word for it…

…how can I know my ratio?”

“By measuring the circumference around your waist, and marking it down. Then measure the circumference around your hips, mark that down as well. Finally, divide the waist-measurement by the hip-measurement and the answer you get is your WHR.”

“Hmm, k, I can’t do it now but I’ll get Cassie to help me later.”

“Sure. There are other aspects of a nice butt which a bimbo may want to polish or refine as well.”

“Such as?”

“Some examples:

  • Butt dents and hip-dips (‘lateral depressions’)
  • ‘back’ dimples (aka ‘sacral dimples’ or supragluteal fossettes)
  • the sacral triangle (v-shaped crease at the top of the buttocks)
  • a longer, more lifted booty-leg-crease (‘infragluteal fold’)
  • and the amount of ‘glute-projection’.

These things highly impact how sexy a booty is to a viewer. Some people fix them with shapewear or certain types of jeans, others go for surgery, others for herbs, others for squats, still others for hypnosis.”

“This is insane. I’ve been posing in bikini shots for years and never gotten this detailed on various aspects of my bum.”

“This is what happens when you ask me to dive deep on a subject, young miss.”

“Well, thank you. I’ve a lot of research to do.”

“What about boobs?”

“Em, isn’t that the name of a movie?”

Bimbo Boobs Held In Hands

“Shush! That’s ‘What About BOB.’ Be serious!”

“Seriously then, ‘science’ says all kinds of things about breasts.

It’s weird. There’s science out there saying medium-sized breasts are best.

Or that slightly sagging breasts are best.

Or that teardrop-shaped are better than round, and all sorts of other ‘studies.’

But bimbos tend to like smooth, round curves, with little separation.

They prize hourglass silhouettes.

Their desire for round, perky, gravity-defying breasts is so intense that many bimbos believe the only path to their ideal breasts is surgery.”

“Is that all true?”

“Hard to say. The science I’ve seen doesn’t seem very scientific, it mostly seems to be ‘asking a sample of men what they find attractive.’ Sometimes you’ll hear the ‘golden ratio’ referenced, and that seems slightly firmer ground, but again, I haven’t been impressed, personally.”

“So then, what’s the real deal with all this?”

“Well, much like booty-shapes…

There are 8-10 different breast-shapes.

And the number of breast-shapes can change, depending on what articles you read.

And while some shapes are more highly desired by most bimbos, and many bimbos have definitely changed the shape of their bust, there are still successful bimbos out there sporting all the different types.”

“So I’ve noticed!”

“Out of all these shapes, bimbos usually desire round, ‘bubble’ shaped breasts, and anyone blessed with this shape naturally will often have an extremely easy time transforming into a bimbo-aesthetic.

In fact, women with naturally round boobs are often labeled ‘bimbo’ at a young age, even if they’re not, and are often accused of having breasts enhancement surgery, even if they haven’t.”

“Probably because their boobs look so good people assume they ‘have to be fake.’”

“Yes, but why is that? Why, when people see wonderfully perky, round boobs, do they not simply assume nature has blessed them? Why do people assume there must have been surgical meddling?”

“Hmm. Good question. Maybe because society hasn’t taken care of their bodies and boobs much, or haven’t bothered evolving them, or passing on good genes, so it’s rare to see round ones…

…and they automatically conclude round breasts are fake? Maybe because most round breasts they’ve seen have been fake? Maybe because they’re insecure with their own boobs and want to take others down a peg?”

“All interesting ideas. I don’t really know, but I do know that round and perky is the main bimbo look here, and it’s a pretty important pillar of bimbohood.”

“You’ve mentioned ‘perky’ a few times.”

“Yes, because that’s often significantly more important than size. A huge amount of people in studies preferred a certain level of firmness and perkiness in boobs, regardless of size, and would often choose a smaller sized bust that had a firm perk to them over a larger size that was loose, sagging, or droopy. Some say this has to do with a sensitivity towards youthfulness and fertility being a priority in male DNA, but whatever the case, it may be worth setting your intentions on firm, perky breasts.”

“Hmmmm… this would probably affect my cleavage too, which is something photogs are often trying to emphasize on shoots.”

“Yes. Measure the distance from the inner-edge of one breast to the inner-edge of the other, and also the distance from one nipple to the other.

That space in-between your breasts is your ‘cleavage measurement.’ It can be wide or narrow, and most women prefer a ‘narrower’ gap.

Firmer, perkier breasts help with this.

They also give a ‘rounding’ to the upper portion of your breasts, indicating more ‘buoyancy’ and ‘youth.’ Firmness, perkiness, roundness, and cleavage are all abundantly sought after in the bimbo world of boobs.”

“Got it. Did your research say anything about nipples?”

“Oh yes, I’ve been SO looking forward to this question, thank you for that Emma.” My voice dripped with sarcasm.

“Ahem. One of the most commonly quoted things is regarding the position of the nipples. They call it the 45:55 ratio, where 45% of the boob is above the nipple, and a sizable 55% of the boob lies below the nipple, meaning that the nipples sit fairly high up on the bust.

This actually seems to hold up, but you can look at a bunch of boobs and decide for yourself. Not to mention nipple-placement horizontally has a certain ‘window’ of what’s most attractive.

They don’t have to be dead-center, but if the nipples are too far off-center towards the inside or outside of each boob, it’s generally less desirable.

Many bimbos would like to change the placement of their nipples, and depending on how deeply you believe in your body’s ability to adapt and transform to meet the vision in your head, decides how ‘possible’ that is for you.”

Emma was actually taking notes on her phone. “Anything else?”

“Some bimbos like the veiny look, others like a smooth-as-silk complexion across their bust.

Some bimbos –like the ones on– have had lots of non-surgical success getting their desired bust, others, like Candy Charms or Jessy Bunny just go for surgery after surgery.

Some bimbos love the daintiness of cute, small areolas, others prefer over-sized dinner-plate versions.

Some bimbos love ghost nipples, others like their areolas to be so dark as to command all viewer attention.

Ultimately, you’ll need to figure out what look suits you best, because it’s your body, your life.”

“Thanks for all this.

So let’s say I wanted breast enlargement, how do I get it?”

“Well, let’s see if you were listening a little earlier in the conversation when we were talking about body transformation… you tell me.”

“Um, I could go the nutritionist method and eat breast-enhancing foods while cutting down on others.

If I go the LOA method, I could affirm them and vision-board them.

If I go the influencer way, I could hit the gym and do some planks to improve perkiness.

There’s probably tricks to increase hormones like estrogen, which result in bigger, firmer, perkier boobs.

Lastly, if I go the traditional bimbo route, I could save up and pay someone like Dr. Ghavami to perform surgery.”

“Well done, and…?”

“And I could also pick a blend of any or all of these and see what works best for me.”

“Spot on.

And if you really, truly dive into the internet forums I mentioned earlier, you’ll find many women who’ve had success increasing their bust-size through a variety of methods.

The real question is, will you engage with these women? Will you explore their methods and success stories? Or will you just head for the scalpel ASAP and pop some silicon in there?

Neither is right or wrong, but in the west at least, instant gratification is sought out much more than other (often more elegant) methods, so it’s very interesting to me to see what people choose.

If you do opt for surgery please do your research and find the best surgeons. Please do your research and learn how to recover smoothly and properly.

Please do your research and learn best practices to avoid complications.”

Measure Boobs Size

“It sounds like you’re not a fan of the surgical route?”

"Well, your Mom had implants when I married her."

“What? Mom’s all natural.”

“Ask her yourself if you don’t believe me. Anyway, I clearly don’t ‘hate’ them, and if she wanted to get them again I wouldn’t stop her.”

“So what’s this vibe I’m getting from you?”

“Well m’dear, I aim to be as unbiased and objective as possible. I focus on being non-judgmental. I love encouraging all humans in all their dreams.


You’re right, I do have a personal preference regarding surgical enhancement.

Personally, I’m not the biggest fan of surgical transformations, even though they can look amazing, and even though most of the bimbo community loves them.

To be clear though:

I’m happy for anyone who gets surgery. I applaud their bold investment. I respect their choice.

The thing is, for someone like me who’s into law of attraction, cellular mastery, and natural approaches…

I consider surgery kind of an unnecessary, less-than-elegant, ‘masculine’ brute-force, invasion of tech to ‘solve’ something that natural cellular adaptation, intention, nutrition, and mind-over-matter practice is far better suited to solve.

I love when people choose surgery because it really, truly feels right to them. I love when it’s their true dream to get it, but often people turn to surgery as a fear-based, ‘shortcutting’, instant-gratification path to body-transformation.

And to me, body-transformation has long been a natural, gentle, gradual process.

People adapt to high heels and most don’t run out to get surgery to shorten their calves, instead, they just practice on heels a bit at a time, until their bodies adapt to it.

It’s fairly gentle, gradual, and an elegant approach, assuming they don’t go overboard or bite off more than they can chew.

People get pretty amazing body-transformations, just by committing to squats and a decent food regimen.

It’s a gentle, permanent change with little-to-no ‘complications’ or ‘healing’ or ‘downtime’ needed.

Sure, they could get all kinds of lipo, surgery, and muscle-grafts to become fit I suppose, but again, it’s a messy, brute-force, masculine, tech-based solution to an organic desire.

I believe people can change most things about their bodies in natural, elegant ways.

If only they’d actually try.

I believe our cells are miraculous and that they respond to our soul’s desires and intentions.

And I’ve seen the proof over and over.

But hey, you gotta do you. I judge no one, and the world needs all kinds of people.

Surgeons are valuable, and silicone-filled bimbos are valuable.

I’m just saying, surgery would be my absolute last resort, and almost certainly unnecessary.

The time of the silicone woman or bionic bimbo is fading, and the time of the ‘natural bimbo’ is debuting, at least, in my opinion.”

“But I thought bimbos loved surgery. Breast augmentations, brazilian butt-lifts, rhinoplasty, labiaplasty, and more are talked about all the time.

I thought that stuff was part of the whole aesthetic?”

“I think that’s just because most bimbos think they’re limited to surgery.

They haven’t explored other methods of transformation. They think the ‘perfect-sphere’ boobs they’re after are only obtainable through surgery.

Declaring surgery as ‘part of the bimbo aesthetic’ is most often done because someone has been convinced that there aren’t other options, and been bullied into staying with the status quo.

Bridgette Bardot, Farah Fawcett, and Jayne Mansfield all pioneered the bimbo label, surgery-free.

Angela White, Milada Moore, and Louisa Khovanski all have bimbo physiques surgery-free.

Chrissy Chlapeka is a popular bimbo spokesperson, and she has a fairly modest bust.

There’s actually only a small section of ‘hardcore’ bimbos who absolutely insist surgery is necessary, and they clearly wouldn’t get along with the people I mentioned above.

This vocal group labels themselves the gatekeepers of bimbohood, and believes that they, and only they, decide the status quo.

Unfortunately, the status quo is basically cramming tech into the already-miraculous human body as a default behavior.

This doesn’t impress me.”

“This is some serious food for thought. You’re making me really reconsider surgery.”

“Well, like I said, don’t let me or anyone bully you away from your dreams. I’m simply sharing my personal biases and preferences.

If you’re totally okay with the massive pain of surgery, complications of rupture, and the silicon or saline look… you do you.

But please just know that anything achievable with surgery, I personally believe the human body can create and evolve in more organic ways, just as well, if not better.”

“I’ll think about it. And everything you taught me about boobs has me thinking I might need my own special breast vision-board first anyway, haha.”

“I support you, hopefully even more than your favorite bra, hon.”

“Oh em gee. Haha. And yes, feeling the love. So once I have my boobs and booty, I just have to make sure my waist is snatched and ta-da, hourglass bombshell!”

“Yes, and I’ve already said all I can say about hourglass figures in my post. It’s called:

Bimbo Hourglass Figure 1080

Hourglass Figures: Why Curvy Shapes Win & How To Get One.

So I’m just going to text you a link to that article and move on, if you don’t mind.”

“Sure thing, I’ve already read some of it, but I’ll keep reading.”

“Good, and hopefully you don’t mind all the nit-picky body-details and beauty-standards we’ve been exploring here.

I’m not saying every woman or bimbo has to be 36-24-36 or an even more exaggerated hourglass.

Times change.

Maybe you want to bring a different look back. For example, big bellies and thighs used to be symbols of fertility and were desirable by royalty. I’m only focusing on the bimbo-aesthetic because you asked me to and this is the kind of stuff that the bimbo-community really cares about.”

“Yes, of course, I know what I’m getting into, and I know you like hourglass babes, why else would you marry Mom?

I also know that appearance is as important for bimbos as business strategy is for billionaires. It just comes with the territory.”

“I’m so happy you understand. And it’s interesting, because bimbos ‘get’ something that most people don’t.”

“Which is?”

“Bimbos understand that appearance is power.”

“Yeah, most models know this on some level."

Wonder Woman Power Pose

“Great! So, no need for me to explain?”

“Well, I’ve also gotten mixed messages from society, often being told I don’t have a ‘real’ career, or that ‘looks aren’t everything’ or that ‘just showing some skin’ isn’t valuable.”

“Bimbos know differently.

How powerful do you think appearance really is?

Is it meaningless fluff, to be judged and sneered at?

Is it an unproductive waste of time to beautify ourselves?

Can beauty influence people?

Take over the world?

Where do we draw the line at the power of appearance?”

“All great questions.”


“Uh, I don’t know?”

“Well, let’s say I served you a mess of spaghetti in a child’s Fisher-Price bowl. The food was nutritious and filling. Then let’s say I served you the exact same spaghetti, but this time I served it on a gold-rimmed alabaster porcelain plate designed by Gucci. It was portioned nicely in the center of the plate, and around the edges it was garnished with slivers of garlic. The rest of the plate was dotted with green crumble oregano.

Exact same spaghetti, different appearance. Which dish tastes better?”

“Don’t they both taste the same?”

Bimbo Lesbian Kiss

“Nope. Science has studied this, and the one that looks better, not only tastes better, a restaurant can charge far more for it, and people will happily pay the fee.”


“Yeah, appearance is powerful. Ever seen a talented artist go ignored on their own, but succeed once they find an agent who presents and markets them well?”

“I have!”

“Appearance is powerful. Or how about if a bimbo walks into a room surrounded by a few ‘average-looking’ girlfriends, what happens?”

“Oh, the bimbo soaks up all the attention in the room, for sure.”

“Exactly, appearance is powerful. Image is ‘everything.’ There’s tons of psychology and science behind the power of presentation, but let’s just say that, even without knowing all that stuff, ‘bimbos’ get it.

They understand the power of appearance, and they use it very well.”

“Yeah they do. And I bet they can secure business deals with a wink or running a nail over their lip or something. Next-level shi–uh–stuff.”

“Indeed, bimbos also understand that…

Body-language trumps words.”

"Ooh, photographers taught me this."

Sexy Bend Pose

“We totally studied this in school. Albert Mehrabian found that communication is 55% nonverbal, 38% vocal, and 7% words.”

“Well there you go. Think of all the bimbos you know in your life.

Are the most effective ones going on and on with words? Is spoken language their main focus? Are they determined to have the best articulation?”

“No, definitely not. Not even the ‘intelligent’ bimbos I’ve looked at focus on verbal communication.

“Indeed. But think about them again.

Are the most effective ones very expressive with their mouth and eyes? Do they use a lot of hand gestures? Do they toss their hair, bite their lip? Do they bend at the hips? Flash some skin? Giggle?”

“They do all those things. They’re also often bouncing, skipping, dancing, cartwheeling, and more. Bimbos even have a special, feminine walk that they practice until it becomes a habit.”

“Right, because they’ve learned something most of our ‘masculine, patriarchal’ society still hasn’t quite realized…

Body-language is more powerful than words.

And again, I guess I’ll note PinkBimboAcademy here because their blog has many posts about bimbo posture, behavior, and gestures, even if many don’t agree with them.”

“This is a game-changer. I think because I look up to you, I tried to copy your ‘way with words’ a bit too much. That’s why I had you teach me ‘communication’ for two days while I was posting on Hive.Blog.”

“Well, words do still play a role, they’re still important for bimbos too. Especially ‘flirty’ or ‘sexy’ words.”

“Good, I’m glad to know all my study and practice wasn’t wasted. But I still think I’ll want to use way less words and way more body-language.”

“Fair enough. One particular aspect of words you might want to look at is names.

For example, many bimbos change their names to be more feminine, glamorous, or ditzy, depending on the vibe they’re going for.

Heather Sweet changed her name to ‘Dita Von Teese.’ Norma Jeane Mortenson changed her name to ‘Marilyn Monroe.’ Onika Tanya Maraj-Petty changed her name to the innuendo-laden ‘Nicki Minaj.’

Your Mom and I think Emma’s an adorable name that speaks volumes, but I realize ‘Brown’ isn’t exactly a riveting surname, and if you want to change your first name, last name, or both, I do understand and support you, it just might take us some getting used to.”

“No worries there Dad, I haven’t even considered changing my name until you just mentioned it, and I doubt I’ll be rushing off to do so anytime soon.”

“Good, but it’s not just names though…

…Voice & vocab are underrated bimbo tools.”

“Compare Cardi B’s voice to Marilyn Monroe’s voice.”


“Marilyn’s very relaxed and gentle and precise with her sounds and words. Cardi’s much more deep, aggressive, almost savage.”

“Well said.

So I’m not sure which ‘bimbo’ you look up to more, both of them were quite successful in their respective fields, but many people find Marilyn’s vocalization much lighter, sexier, and more feminine and bimbo-y.”

“I totally understand why, I feel the same. I mean, I love me some Cardi, but she’s definitely not my voice role-model.”

“Exactly, but on the other hand, can you imagine Marilyn or Dolly singing a song called, uh, ‘wet-ass pussy’?”

“Haha, I just can’t picture it.”

“Sure, but could you picture a barbie such as Danii Banks using words like that?”

“Oh, yeah, she says more sexual things than that all the time.”

“So what’s the takeaway from all this?”

“Ummm, that…although the bulk of effective communication is non-verbal, and bimbos use body language well, voice and word-choice are still important enough to improve.

I can make my voice and vocab more like Marilyn Monroe’s, delicate, lightly flirty, but mostly fam-friendly, or I can make it more like Cardi’s or Aletta’s, heavier, cruder, and more daringly sexual.”

“A brilliant summary, yes, or anywhere in between. You basically have it.

And I sent a youtube channel to your phone called ‘Improve Your Voice’ that has helped many change their voice just through a bit of practice and vocal exercises.”

“This is so helpful, thank you. I’m starting to feel nervous though, if I change my voice, I bet Mia’s going to give me hell for catering to the patriarchy.”

“That’s not uncommon, Em. Committing to a bold form of hyper-femininity is going to ruffle some feathers, which brings us to another very important aspect of your bimbo journey.”

“Oh? Like what?”

Bimbo Friends Melon 1080

“Bimbo circles, bimbo friends.”

“Choosing your bimbo circle might be a really hard decision for you. It’s probably one of the most difficult decisions when pursuing bimbohood, or any dream, actually.”

“But Dad, I love making friends. It’s not hard!” Em rolled her eyes at me.

I moved closer to Emma, knowing she didn’t understand what I was about to say…

…”Em, you said Mia didn’t take your bimbofication choice well initially, right?”

I looked at my daughter pointedly, knowing this part of our conversation might upset her, but also knowing she needed to understand how important this is for her dreams.

“Yeah, but we made up. It’s no big deal, we’ve gotten into fights loads of times over the years.”

“Emma, does Mia support your bimbo dreams the way we do?” She looked down at the floor and shook her head. I could see tears starting to well up in her eyes.

“Shh, shh, it’s ok, Em…

No one has to support your dreams.

Just be aware that if she doesn’t support your dreams then she may be an obstacle keeping you from your dreams, at least temporarily.

And if someone isn’t being supportive towards your dreams then you have to decide what’s more important…your ‘friends’ or your dreams.”

I stopped talking to give her the chance to take in what I said.

“Buh…but…we’ve been friends since kindergarten. I don’t want to stop being friends with Mia!” Emma started crying outright.

I reached out and hugged her close. I let her cry for a few minutes to process what I was saying. When she pulled back, I reached for a tissue and handed it to her.

It broke my heart to watch my daughter cry over possibly losing her oldest friend.

“To be clear, I’m not pushing for this. I like Mia, she’s been a staple in our home for years, and I don’t want you to have to give up your friendship with her.

But depending on her attitude going forward, you may have to decide what’s more important to you… Mia or bimbohood.”

“Why do I have to choose? That’s not fair!” Emma stomped her foot and slouched down, defeated. Still, her body language made it clear that she understood.

“You know we all love Mia. But what are you going to do when she starts putting you down for your bimbo look? Or talks about you behind your back? Or judges you and derides every change you make?” Emma interrupted…

“…You taught me not to care what people think or say about me,” she shot back in answer to my questions.

“You’re right, that’s exactly what we taught you.

But did we teach you to be friends with people who say mean things to you or about you? Or those who subtly put you down? Or did we teach you to get some distance from people like that and focus on being happy with whatever you’re doing?”

Emma looked up at me with giant doe-eyes brimming with tears.

“You taught me to distance myself and be happy with what I’m doing.”

“So the question is, do you want to stay friends with an unsupportive, judgmental, and mean person who thinks she’s ‘better’ than bimbos? Can you successfully become the bimbo you desire to be around these kinds of people?

Bimbo Haters Cara Delevigne_Face

Can you see yourself as a bimbo who hangs with bimbo-haters?”

She shook her head and whispered “No. I can’t.”

“Now you know why I said it’s one of the hardest decisions to make.

You have to decide what you want more, your old friends or your new dreams.

That doesn’t mean you can’t have any friends.

It just means that you’ll need to find new ‘bimbo-friendly’ allies.

With the internet now, it’s easy to find people out there who will support you, love you, and inspire you. You just have to make the effort of going to find them. They’re not going to come to knock on your door and ask if you can go outside to play.”

I handed her another tissue.

Em nodded, dabbing at the corners of her eyes. “You’re right. As usual, Dad.”

I sighed. “I don’t care about being right. I care about doing the right thing.

And the right thing is to be honest with yourself about your friendship with Mia.

If she’s not ‘HELL YES’ on board with your dream then it’s a ‘hell no.’

You deserve friends who will be 100% supportive of your dreams.”

She nodded, sat up higher, and inhaled deeply.

“Ok Dad! I get it. I’m totally down for finding new friends who will love my bimbo-dreams and who are on the same path as I am. I want to have people LIKE me around. I want people who get me.

We’ll see how Mia handles more of my bolder changes, and if she behaves how my gut says she will, well… I love Mia, but may have to let her go for a while…

…so I’ll likely have to find new bimbo friends. How can I start?”

I smiled, happy she perked up and was clearly feeling better. “Conveniently, I have a list for you right here…”

Discord Servers:



“That’s a huge help to get me started, thanks! I understand what you mean about my ‘circles’ of friends and who I spend my time with being important.”

“Yes, in fact, the people you hang around can even affect your nutritional habits.

Do you have a bimbo diet?”

Do you have a bimbo diet?"

“I guess. My diet’s fine, and I’m pretty slender.”

Bimbo - Banana

“And having a good diet already is a blessing…

…but many aren’t so lucky, and if you study the eating habits of bimbos you may find something interesting.”

“What would I find?”

“They seem to gravitate towards fruit.”


“I mean, I don’t have solid data on it, but anecdotally it seems to hold up.”

“Well I read that Scarlett Johansson doesn’t workout or diet, she just effortlessly and naturally manifests her looks.”

“Yep, and Jessica Simpson doesn’t brush her teeth, but somehow has naturally stunning white teeth.”

“So, then, I can just eat whatever I want while setting intentions to have an effortless bimbo-body?”

“That depends on how confident and practiced you are at manifesting the body you want without the help of diet or exercise.

Most people have weak beliefs in themselves and their cells, so are much better served by eating healthy and staying active.”

“Well, I’m ok right now, so I’m just going to keep doing what I’ve been doing.”

“OK, but if things change as you get older, you may want to keep an eye on your eating habits, portion-size, and favorite foods.”

“Fine, but I’m not becoming a fruitarian.”

Bimbo Diet Banana Kiss

“I’m not saying you should, I’m just saying Demi Rose Mawby loves fruit, Lindsey Pelas loves fruit, Louisa Khovanski loves fruit. You’ll find barely a carb in any of their posts.”

“Sure but Toochi Kash, Brittanya Razavi, and Lexi2Legit all love and consume fast food.”

“Touché. You have a point.

I honestly don’t have enough data on bimbo nutrition.

If it were me though, if I was good at manifesting things naturally and ‘free’ of most limiting food beliefs, I wouldn’t worry about it much.

On the other hand, if I was sensitive to food and had a number of limiting food-beliefs, then I’d put in the time and effort to study everything I could about nutrition.

I’d study scientific approaches like Lyle McDonald and John Berardi.

I’d study holistic nutrition and human design like Jenna Zoe.

I’d study the eat-what-you-want crowd like Scar Jo.

And most importantly, I’d get in tune with my body, listen to my cells, and start experimenting with my own cravings and impulses.”

“I appreciate all this…er…food for thought.”

“Now who’s dropping the ‘cheesy’ lines?”

“I couldn’t help myself. It made me giggle as soon as I thought about it.”

“Hah. Speaking of giggling…

Let’s discuss the ‘airhead’ part of bimbos.

It's up to you to decide your intelligence.”

Bimbo Airhead - Brittany Pierce

“How so?”

“You’re an expert on you. You have a PHd on you. Others can’t tell you anything about you, that you can’t figure out yourself. So you know what level of thought, intellect, and analysis suits you. Dolly Parton and Marilyn Monroe are known to be pretty smart, while other bimbos don’t have such reputations.”

“I like being an expert on me. And I haven’t decided how ‘smart’ or ‘dumb’ I want to be on my bimbo journey yet.”

“Before you decide, let me ask you a question: Em, would you say I’m a smart person?”

“Definitely. I mean you even wrote a guide on how to be smart, haha.”

“Fair enough. But let me ask you this, have you ever heard of a happy philosopher or political activist?”

“I actually haven’t.”

“Why do you think you haven’t come across one? Is it because you don’t hang out in those circles? Is it because the media is biased towards misery? Or is it because they’re actually quite rare?”

“I think they’re actually quite rare.”

“OK, but have you ever heard of a happy, bubbly actress, model, singer, or bimbo?”

“Yes, I’ve seen many.”

“Alright, these questions are kind of biased, and far from scientific, but there is something to them.

Over-thinking tends to lead us away from physical, bodily enjoyment and towards over-thinking on the human condition.

So the bimbo movement isn’t really about being airheaded for the sake of being airheaded, it’s about being silly, playful, and not taking life so seriously.

Here, I’m texting you a couple videos of intelligent women, consciously choosing to ‘play dumb’ and explaining why they do it.”

Bimbo Ditz Dumb 1080

‘Dumb’ for most bimbos is mostly about letting thought go, being more ‘empty-headed’ so that you’re more in-tune with your body, with a physical, sensual, enjoyable life.

It doesn’t mean you can’t ever think, it just means to step away from the news, drama, and issues.

Step away from ‘solving’ things for everyone and giving advice, and instead provide a different kind of value.

Provide eye candy, provide beauty, provide soothing, provide gentleness, provide understanding, provide distraction from a serious, dark world.

Instead of acting like intellectual value is the be all and end all, instead realize that physical, sensual, body-based value is just as valuable, if not more so, and temporarily ‘dumbing down’ is a powerful way to highlight that fact.”

“I love it! Airheaded-ness is more like a chosen state of mind, one that results in a certain state of body. It could be a huge blessing to embrace a bubbly, pink, happy void, at least from time to time.”

“That’s the idea. And a big part of achieving this state of mind is about adjusting your ‘information flow.’”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean you may want to spend a bit less time with ‘serious’ books & news that bring you down or distract you from your bimbo mission.

You may want to focus on materials that elevate your ability to beautify yourself and build your fanbase and following.

While I’d never want to raise a ‘dumb’ daughter if I could help it, do keep in mind that there’s nothing wrong with bringing value to the world heavily through beauty while minimizing or taking the focus off of your intellect. Marilyn did exactly that.”

“I’m starting to see that. If Marilyn can ‘play dumb’ and still rock a savvy career, plus start her own production company, so can I!”

“Good! And you’ll probably need to do something like that, or marry a rich dude, because well…

Bimbofication can be expensive!”

"OMG, it so is.

Bimbos Burn Money Icon

“And that’s probably another reason you’re not a fan of surgery, since it’s one of the most costly parts of bimbofication.”

“True enough. That’s a big part of why it’s often a huge investment, but it’s not the only one.

Bimbos need a substantial clothing budget too, and if you go the eat-super-healthy route, you might need a sizable food budget for organics or a gym membership or something else.”

“Yikes, this is starting to sound beyond my bank account.”

“It can be, but it doesn’t have to be. In fact, it can be extremely profitable and wealth-building.”

“Profitable? As in, earn me money?

“Yep, it just depends on your perspective. Like, what did you tell me when I first asked you why you were doing this?”

“That hyper-femininity is cool?”

“Yeah, but what did you say about your career?”

“I honestly don’t remember.”

“You said you wanted bimbofication to ‘ turn up [your] modeling career.”

“Oh, yes! I did! And it can, Marilyn’s bombshell look is how she commanded such high salaries.”

“Bam! And you can too. Bimboization can often pay for itself, if done well.”


“So many ways. I’ve seen bimbos sell sexy photos or start OnlyFans to fund their transformation.

I’ve seen bimbos become ‘ambassadors’ for certain brands and make bank off that. I’ve seen bimbos hook-up with rich guys to fund their transformation.

I’ve seen bimbos become actresses to fund their transformation. I’ve seen them publish calendars. I’ve even seen bimbos run kickstarters to fund-raise their transformation.”

“Wow, that’s a lot of ways to monetize.

Bimbo Money 1080

“Yep, and there’s more if you’re creative. I’ve seen bimbos become image or wardrobe consultants.

The main thing here is that they saw their own consistent value, figured out how to add consistent value to others’ lives, and had fun doing it.

Heck, Natasha Grano is basically an ‘LOA’ bimbo and motivational speaker.”

“But I’m not a bimbo yet, so I probably can’t do most of those, right?”

“Hardly. You’ve been making money as a model for years without being a bimbo, why would it be any harder just because you’ve started your femininity-journey?”

“Ah, real talk. So I can find a path to monetize and fund my bimbofication.”

“Anyone can.

Human beings are creative, resourceful, valuable creatures able to fund and monetize basically any dream or desire they have. You just have to start believing in and taking action towards it.”

“Thanks for the reminder.

And you mentioned an important part of monetizing bimbofication is to ‘have fun doing it.’ What did you mean by that?”

“It’s about replacing ‘work’ with ‘play.’”

“Oh please, that’s a pipe dream, everyone has to work.”


And I apologize if my and your Mom’s passion for our ‘work’ gave you that impression.

The truth is, our ‘work’ is really play.

We love what we do. We thrive on it. We prioritize it in our schedule the way you’d prioritize going out with your friends or watching Netflix. It’s fun.”

“What about when you were young like me though? Didn’t you work retail or something?”

“Yes, and I tried to ‘make it fun’ but I mostly hated it.

I wish I had parents back then to insist I focus on making my life into play. I wish they’d nudged me to find activities that suited me first, and figure out a way to monetize them second, not the other way round.

But hey, we live and learn, and I figured it out eventually, and now I’m passing on these hard-won lessons to you. Successful bimbos live lives of play, period.”

“They have fun dressing up.

They have fun shopping.

They have fun experimenting with poses and expressions.

They have fun in photoshoots.

They have fun in fashion-consulting.

They have fun running kickstarters.

They have fun flirting and bagging a rich man.

Any successful bimbo you can show me, will have fun and play as major components of their success, and any struggling or failed bimbo you can show me will have major ‘hard work’ vibes, and a focus on ‘grinding out funds’ because ‘that’s the way the world works’ or something.”

“I mostly do what’s fun–”

“–’mostly’ doesn’t cut it, I’m sorry to say. Doing ‘mostly fun’ things keeps you poor. It won’t secure much funding at all.”


“Because the universe rewards human beings who put joy, laughter, and fun into the world.

Even ‘evil’ people that we don’t like can do well in life as long as they believe what they’re doing is fun and satisfying for them.

Because that ‘fun’ vibe is like catnip to the universe.

The universe sees fun, and thinks to itself *‘Holy moly, they’re having fun, if they commit to it and keep it up, I’ll definitely deliver more resources to continue evolving that fun, but if they start doubting and abandon their fun, I won’t bother sending any resources.’*”

“That can’t be for real…”

“OK, maybe not word-for-word, but that principle really is at play in the universe, and any idol or hero you look up to has figured it out and managed to leverage it.

It was scary at first to prioritize fun over money, but simply by taking the leap, experimenting, and trying it out, your heroes discovered that it flat-out works.

And that it’s the only thing that really works. So if you want your bimbo-journey to be funded easily and well, you’ll have to practice committing to the fun of it, and maintaining true, real, child-like faith that the resources necessary will arrive.”

“This is a game-changer. Are there any books I can read about this?”

“Hmmm, depending on how open you are to ‘woo-woo’ stuff, I’d go for Think And Grow Rich for the spiritually-timid, to Money & The Law Of Attraction for the spiritually-average, to Creating Money for the spiritually ‘out-there.’”

“I really appreciate this, because money was honestly one of my biggest concerns.”

“Concerns are exactly the problem.

If you want to resonate with solutions you need to take your attention off concerns and put it on the many creative solutions that exist, real or imagined.”


Bimbo Youthfulness Lollipop

“Play also ties into ‘youthfulness.’”

“Oh bimbos love youth.”

“They do, but society has really weird views on youth. Pause and reflect. It’s really desirable to be youthful, vibrant, and alive, right?”


“But what happens if you get too youthful in our society? Are lolita-vibes praised or frowned upon?”

“Mostly frowned upon, unless you’re in the bimbo community.”

“Exactly. So people want to be youthful, but if they appear too youthful, society starts judging them pretty harshly.

If a person of any gender chooses to date someone multiple decades younger than them, it’s a scandal receiving instant judgment in our culture.

But studies have shown men dating a younger woman actually extend their lifespan and live longer. Is this really such a terrible thing?”

“I dunno, recently my feeds have been blowing up about how terrible Leo DiCaprio is for his dating choices.”

“There’s no real debate that youthfulness isn’t a maze of mixed messages in our society.

But, despite hyper-youth being frowned upon by most of the media, significant youthfulness is often a clear and defining trait of bimbohood.”

“Yeah, come to think of it, I can’t think of too many ‘old’ bimbos. Even someone like Dolly Parton, who’s getting up there, somehow still ‘feels’ young to everyone, if you get what I’m saying.”

“Yes, that’s because youth is a ‘vibe’ you can feel.

It’s something internal that often expresses itself in external physical features, but it doesn’t have to.

Even blind people can ‘feel’ a youthful person from one who is not.”

“And like everything else you’ve taught me, there’s multiple paths and multiple solutions for achieving high levels of youthfulness, even at an older chronological age, right?”

“Hear hear! Just so.

It’s all about accessing a certain ‘vibe’ within yourself. Plenty of people can paint themselves up or dress themselves down, but if that playful, youthful, fun, flirty, bimbo ‘vibe’ isn’t in them consistently and habitually, their bimbo-ness is going to feel ‘off’ to others.”

“It sounds like…

the key thing about being a bimbo is the ‘vibe.’”

"Yes! You nailed it! The biggest lesson of them all."

Bimbo Vibe Icon

“I’m kinda proud.”

“Truth is, everyone can feel the ‘vibe’ of a bimbo who’s aligned and being her ‘true bimbo self.’”


“She’s radiant, lighting up her environment.

She’s playful, turning all work into play.

She’s provocative, compelling attention with daring appearance.

She’s ‘connected’, making lots of social introductions and building social currency.

She’s expressive and masterful with body-language.

It doesn’t matter if she’s got big fake boobs or plastic lips. It doesn’t matter if she’s just starting her weight-loss journey or she’s an hourglass already.

An excellent bimbo is one who’s got an overall aura, or bimbo vibe.

It’s an energy that comes with lots of practice, deep-seated self-belief, and the best of intentions brought to the table in every situation.”

“Wow, that sounds so beautiful.”

“Anyone who’s executing their chosen identity well is beautiful. A ‘grampa’ exuding well-crafted ‘grampa’ vibes is a beautiful thing. An entrepreneur embodying well-executed ‘entrepreneur’ vibes is a beautiful thing.

And a bimbo expressing well-animated ‘bimbo’ vibes is a beautiful thing.”

“So true. How can I get the bimbo ‘vibe’ right?”

Bimbo Vibe Marilyn Monroe

“It’s different for everyone. Some find that prioritizing makeup first thing in the morning gets them feeling bimbo-y all day.

Some like to flirt every chance they get or post on Instagram daily.

Others like to dance to a bimbo playlist.

Ultimately, it’s not about what actions you take, it’s about what feelings you embody.

Getting the vibe right requires an emotional intelligence, maturity, and mastery that most people never attempt.

Marilyn Monroe had bimbo vibes on and off screen, but she also owned a personal library containing 400 books.

She was a smart girl who understood the bimbo vibe well, and knew how to make that role feel natural and habitual to herself.”

“I want to have a similar vibe, it’ll be the icing on the cake of my transformation.”

“By all means.

Just know that after all your transformation, and when you’ve finally got the vibe ‘right,’ you’ll be quite successful.

In this case, it’s sometimes tempting to get comfortable and complacent.”

“How so?”

“Some bimbos start losing their fanbases and their attention from society because they refuse to innovate or bring something fresh to the table. They think ‘it took me so many experiments to find what works for me, no way in hell I’m changing it.’”

“Sounds like Blockbuster when Netflix came around, heehee.”

“Yes, and successful bimbos know that…

…Variety, novelty, and change are vital.

It's a balance of finding what works & experimenting.

Bimbo - Pink Pencils

Great bimbos know it’s wise to find your signature look, but not get too ‘comfortable.’

It’s still important to experiment with new looks, accessories, vocalizations, etcetera.”

“Can you give me some examples?”

“Pick any bimbo success-story.

Have you noticed that their wardrobe changes all the time?

Their hair and nails change all the time.

Their interior decor changes all the time.

Do you think Jeff Bezos or Mark Zuckerberg does that stuff?

No, but they do innovate and experiment in their business all the time, because even non-bimbos know that to keep rising up and growing your success, means to keep experimenting in your given passion, industry, or hobby.

Getting too comfortable, complacent, or stagnant is not an option.”

“So I should really be experimenting with my bimbo-journey every day?”

Bimbo Variety Hair Colors 1080

“Well, how frequent and consistent is up to you.

But the bimbos you admire probably experimented every other day at the very least, and for the truly great ones it was likely daily.

Jennifer Lawrence, while not a traditional bimbo, understands the power of variety and experimentation. She has a different hair (& lip) style-and-color practically every interview! Give the subject consideration for yourself.”

“I will.

And you’ve already went way beyond expectations in helping me with all this bimbo stuff, but there’s one area we’ve both kind of been avoiding, and after all your talk about boldly speaking my mind, experimenting, and all the rest, I feel the right thing to do is bring it up.”

“Oho, and what might that be?

“Please tell me about bimbo sexuality.”

"I can't."


“Ohhhh no. No way. Nuh uh.

I’ve already crossed enough lines for one day, thank you. Go ask your mother.”


Emma found her mother Maria out in the garden.

“Mooooooooooooom! Dad wouldn’t talk to me about…

…sluttiness, submissiveness, or sex.

He told me to ask you instead.”

“Oh my goodness.

Your father told me all about your ‘bimbo dreams’ last night, and I’ll be honest with you– although I’ve never wanted to be a ‘bimbo’ in the way you’re thinking, when I was a little girl I did want to be in Playboy.

I never actually did it because I was too scared of judgment and my life went in a different direction, but deep-down I’ve always wondered what it would be like.”

“Apple doesn’t fall far from the tree I guess.”

“That’s right, mamita.

And you know you can ask me anything, even if your Dad’s too much of a scaredy-pants, so go ahead.”

“I want to know, do bimbos have to be ‘submissive?’ Is that the same as being a trophy wife? Are you guys ok if I want to move from modeling into porn?”

Maria laughed musically. “Ah mi nina, you’re something else. I’m willing to bet no other child on our block has asked such things–”

“–or our continent, ell oh ell–”

“–But don’t you worry, we’ll get to the bottom of it together. First things first, do you know the difference between eye-candy, a trophy wife, a slut, a whore, a doll, a toy, a sex object, a submissive, and a ‘slave’?”

“Uh, not really. I can guess but oddly my school didn’t cover ‘slut’ vs. ‘whore’ in sex ed.”

“No need to be snippy, you’re an adult now, and you might’ve looked into this stuff yourself, so I had to check.

Anyway, because these are sexual concepts and terms that women in the bimbo world toss around constantly, it pays to know what you’re talking about, and what people mean when they say them.”

“Got it, where do we start?”

Bimbo Submissive 1080

“You tell me. Pick a term and I’ll explain it.”

“Okaaaaay…how about…

“Wow. I’m super-grateful I can ask you about this stuff.”

“My pleasure.

And all of the above terms have regularly been used as insults to degrade people, but various bimbos in the community have reclaimed each term and turned them into positives that they’re unashamed and proud of.”

“They’d probably have to, a lot of the bimbos I know actually get into camming, or even hardcore porn.”

“Ah, yes, now, about this ‘porn’ business…”

“What about it?”

“Well, your father and I are pretty liberal, and we do our best not to judge other people’s dreams and career-paths, but well…”

“Don’t worry Mom, I’m leaning more towards the traditional ‘trophy-wife’ type of ‘soft’ bimbo or ‘bimbo-actress’ type, I’m only interested in sharing my most intimate body parts with a select few I feel are worthy.”

“I’m happy to hear that mi vida, because I’m sure I could find it in me to support you in a graphic porn career, but I really wasn’t looking forward to it.”

“I imagine I’d feel the same if I was having a similar chat with my daughter.”

“We’re on the same page.

That said, nudity and porn are highly sought-after in our rather repressed society.

This makes them ‘in-demand’ and people are often willing to pay extraordinary amounts and lavish tremendous gifts on someone who can market their nudity well.”

“Yeah, Belle Delphine was so good at marketing her intimate areas, she even ended up selling her bathwater and making a small fortune off it.”

“I’m not familiar with her, but it sounds like she understood the power of a beautiful feminine body and used it well.”

“She did, to a point, but a lot of her marketing was based on mystique, and when she started doing tons of interviews, letting people in on the secret, and failing to ‘raise the stakes’ like she’d been doing… her nekkidness was no longer in-demand.”

“Makes sense.

That kind of thing can be avoided with a bit more savvy.

A similar thing happened to Bella Thorne. She got a ton of backlash from her OnlyFans ‘scam,’ in part because she was so good at hyping up her nakedness, but also because she failed to deliver on her product’s promises.

Your father once wrote a post called 7 Secrets To Make Money Modeling, and I think it touched on some of this stuff briefly.”

“He did, and I’m pretty sure I inspired it.

Back when I read it I don’t think I fully understood what he meant about branding myself as a model, developing signature looks, and the power of showing skin though.”

“Feel free to re-read and see what you think.”

“Well, either way, I’m just glad you talked to me about all this stuff.

Sexuality and sex appeal seems to be a huge part of bimbofication, but it’s hard to find anyone to have a sane, honest discussion about it.”

Bimbo Porn 1080
Aletta Ocean Bimbo Sexuality

“Yes, bimbos tend to have unique sexualities.”

“How would you summarize it?”

“Basically, they understand sex appeal is highly valuable.

They understand it can take many forms and have many degrees of intensity or boldness.

They understand there’s zero place for judgment, but it is worth exploring where they fall on the ‘bimbo sexuality’ spectrum.

They understand that their sexuality can change and evolve, but it’s unwise to let fear, shame, or judgment dictate it.

Instead they dig deep within themselves and figure out what their true desire and conscious intentions are, then they act accordingly.

If their heart tells them being hypersexual is the path, they follow it.

If their heart tells them being the most modest bimbo on earth is the path, they follow that too.

If their heart tells them to explore both, at various phases of their lives, they honor that as well.

To be honest, I prefer to have a more modest daughter who treats sex a bit more sacredly, but you know I support whatever you choose.

And if you do want to ‘have sex like a bimbo’ your father showed me some pretty, um… interesting… guides to bimbo sex on something he called PBA.”

“It sounds like bimbos are true-blue friends of human sexuality.”

“That’s a great way to put it! Just remember, this doesn’t mean you automatically have to sign up for gangbangs…

Bimbo Checkboxes 1080

…Bimbohood is a spectrum of checkboxes.”

“What on earth does that mean?”

“It means that you don’t have to be self-conscious about ‘missing’ an aspect or two, or ten, of bimbohood, honey.

Not having an OnlyFans, doesn’t mean you’re not a bimbo.

And not having ‘beachball boobs’ doesn’t automatically kick you out of the bimbo-club.

Having a bit more ‘peach fuzz’ hair on your arms or upper-lip than Abigail Ratchford, doesn’t destroy your bimbo identity, all these things are just one individual ‘bimbo checkbox’ out of hundreds.

If you want to be more of a ‘soft bimbo’ like Ariana Grande, (some bimbos get really upset if a ‘soft bimbo’ claims the ‘bimbo’ label) you can leave the ‘blonde hair’, ‘silicone boobs’, and ‘does porn’ checkboxes, unchecked.

If you want to be more of a ‘hard bimbo’ like Aletta Ocean,–“

“You know Aletta?!”

“Not really, Dad gave me a quick primer so I’d be able to help you.”

“Anyway, if you wanna be more like Aletta, you’ll probably want to check off some different checkboxes making sure you check ‘silicone boobs,’ ‘does porn,’ and even the ‘publicly kinky’ boxes, for example.

Neither Ariana or Aletta is better than the other, they’re just different flavors of ‘bimbo’ on the ‘bimbo spectrum.’ I hope this is reassuring.”

“Thanks Mom.

I wasn’t too worried that I’d lose my bimbo-card for not baring-all, but that is really reassuring, and I bet there are other girls on their bimbo journey who actually do panic if there’s a ‘checkbox’ they missed.”


That said, if you’re missing like 80 out of 100 checkboxes, like you don’t wear bimbo makeup, have bimbo hair, you’re 300 pounds overweight, you act and sound like a man, have super-thin lips, and you’re basically the opposite of a bimbo in every way…

Now you may have cause for concern.”

“Ah, because it’s ok to miss a checkbox here and there, or focus on some aspects of bimbosity over others, even skipping a good many…

But if you’re missing the vast majority, you’re just not viable in the bimbo category at that point, yes?”

“That’s right mi amor, and also the less checkboxes you check off, the less of a bimbo you ‘seem’ to be to others, which can either generate more or less haters, depending..”

“Oh em gee. I don’t want haters!”

“That’s like saying ‘I don’t want to get wet’ when going swimming.

You’re pursuing bimbohood, haters come with the territory. And in fact, the mark of a successful bimbo is often how well they handle haters, so…

…please keep your cool when dealing with haters.”

It's a balance of finding what works & experimenting.

Bimbo - Haters Emoji

“But why?! And must I have haters?”

“My sweet girl, you’re hugely blessed to have an open-minded family who supports your dreams, even when they go against society’s preferences.

Many you meet won’t be this encouraging. And just like other bold women before you, you’re going to get haters.

And the hate can get so intense that you start abandoning your dreams, making decisions out of fear, rather than the pure love in your heart.

It can become so easy to just cave into the pressure and undo all the time and energy you’ve invested in your dream.

And you’re basically an adult now, soon to be out there on your own, living your own life.

You’ll move away and your father and I won’t be around as much, so I can only hope we’ve raised you to be strong enough and level-headed enough to handle haters with class.

Don’t let anyone bully you away from your dreams.

Bad things happen to everyone, but you don’t have to choose bad reactions.

Happiness is a choice.

People may pressure you to sideline your dreams, but it’s your choice whether you cave to that pressure or not.

So don’t let anyone nudge you away from your happy vibes, even for a split-second.”

“Do you think it’s possible to avoid haters entirely if I try? You always tell me anything’s possible, maybe I’ll be the first bimbo not to have any?”

“I guess there’s some bizarre dimension where that’s technically possible, but it’s silly to pursue, in my opinion, but you do you.

More than that though, I believe you should be aiming to get at least *some* haters.”

“How come?”

“Because that’s what talented bimbos do. Think about it. I’ll list a few names, and you tell me whether they made sure to do controversial, hater-generating things, or if they avoided that. Ready?”


“Marilyn Monroe, prioritized controversial behavior, or not?”

“Definitely controversial.”

“Anna-Nicole Smith, prioritized controversial behavior, or not?”

“She totally prioritized it.”

“Pamela Anderson? Hater-generating, or no?”

“Yeah she got plenty of haters and wasn’t shy about it.”

“Coco Austin, Ice T’s wife?”

“Her too.

Ok, I get your point. If I’m going to take this bimbo-thing seriously, and follow in the footsteps of these women before me, I’m going to have to step into controversy consciously and intentionally.”

“Exactly. I didn’t raise a timid daughter who can’t step up and shine if she wants to.”

“Thanks Mom, I’ve got this. I’m on a mission, and it won’t do for me to ‘play small’ or fear controversy, I appreciate the insight.”

“I’m proud of your bimbo mission, hija.”

“Me too! And I think the world really needs it.”

“I agree! If Arnold Schwarzenegger or Sylvester Stallone choose to be hyper-masculine, they get accolades.

If Hugh Jackman or Russell Crowe choose to be hyper-masculine, they get praise.

It should be the same for any woman who chooses to be hyper-feminine.

If you want to embody certain feminine traits and downplay or minimize some masculine ones, I believe it takes real, conscious effort and it injects a unique kind of value into the world.

Marilyn Monroe and Brigitte Bardot understood this.

Dolly Parton and Anna-Nicole Smith understood this.

They all took a stand against the stigma and hate for hyper-feminine women and they succeeded brilliantly in their lives. If you want to follow a similar path, or even take it to the next level, I’m proud of you.

The world needs more femininity, and if you want to turn it up to eleven, I celebrate you.”

“Aw, Mom. I love you and Dad so much.”

“We love you too, now get out there and bimbo-it-up!”

This wraps up 'How To Be A Bimbo.'

Whew. This is one of the ‘craziest’ pieces I’ve ever written. I hope you enjoyed it and were able to read it with an open mind.

I hope you can tell I have the best of intentions here, and am simply helping nudge certain people along on whatever their specific dreams are.

If anything doesn’t resonate with you, please be kind enough to let it be and do your own thing instead. It’d be such a wonderful world if more people let others pursue their dreams in peace.

Either way, I appreciate you reading, sharing, commenting, and even skimming. Wishing you a great day and a satisfying feminine, masculine, or neutral journey in life, according to your desire.

Much love,

(Stock images courtesy of my favorite stock site,, and special thanks to @cynshineonline for crazy amounts of help, proof-reading, inspiration, and writing the ‘nails,’ ‘makeup’, ‘heels,’ and ‘friends’ sections.)

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